The Woman Who Saved Marriage/2nd Act/ 50th Tribute/ NARME Dates/ Alabama Grant - 10/25/11

Wed Oct 26 00:16:44 EDT 2011

>> - The Woman Who Saved Marriage
>> - THE SECOND ACT
>> - 50th Wedding Anniversary Tribute
>> - Save the Dates: NARME 2012 CONFERENCE: BALTIMORE, JULY 20-25
>> - Grant brings big money to college
> 
> -------------------------------------
> Dear Ones, 
> 
>> I¹ve been away for 2+ weeks and returned to over a thousand emails one of
>> which (posted below) perked me up  though not so sure we can say we¹ve
>> ³saved marriage.² We shall see....
>> In any case, my thanks to Susan Heitler for such a nice tribute and also to
>> all of you who forwarded it to me and added your own quite fulsome praise.  I
>> am also encouraged by the dozens of emails from folks looking for Marriage
>> Education classes.  People visit the Smart Marriages website and read about
>> the wonders of marriage education, and then, naturally, want to take a
>> Marriage Education class.  That¹s a good thing though the fact that many
>> still mention that their marriage counselor has suggested they separate makes
>> me nuts.  I¹m also dismayed when I can¹t direct those who are inquiring to
>> classes in their cities  sometimes not even in their states.  If you¹re
>> teaching a class, please list it on the Directory.  Or, if you¹re teaching
>> online or by phone, many couples are in locations where we have no coverage
>> and would appreciate an at-a-distance marriage education opportunity. Here¹s
>> the at-a-distance section:
>> http://www.smartmarriages.com/app/Directory.BrowsePrograms#type_11
>> Get thee listed. And, maybe I should also say, get your program online. -
>> diane 
>> 
>>  ------------------------------------------------
>> - The Woman Who Saved Marriage
>> Diane Sollee launched marriage education and stopped the divorce epidemic.
>> October 21, 2011 by Susan  Heitler, Ph.D
>> http://tinyurl.com/3efzlsc
>> ------------------------------------------------
>> - THE SECOND ACT
>> I¹m told that the website I included in the post about the Second Act Divorce
>> Reforem proposal for state legislation,  has no info about it.  Find that
>> info here: http://americanvalues.org/secondchances
>> 
>> Also, you can get an audio, video or transcript of the Bill Doherty/Leah
>> Sears Second Act event at Brookings here:
>> http://www.brookings.edu/events/2011/1021_divorce.aspx
>  _____________________________________________
>> - 50th Wedding Anniversary Tribute
>> Part of my trip involved attending the 50th anniversary of my
>> daughter-in-law¹s parents.  Here are her remarks at their vow-renewal
>> celebration.  You can see that she used the Smart Marriages¹ quotes page,
>> which anyone can do:
>> http://www.smartmarriages.com/marriage.quotes.html.  But she¹s done the work
>> and did a great job (there wasn¹t a dry eye in the house) so I¹lll share it
>> as it might make it easier for the rest of you (IF you get so lucky as to
>> host a 50th celebration!)   - diane
>> 
> Hi  I¹m Margie, and my sisters, Georgia and Jaime, and I want to welcome you
> all and thank you for coming today.  We realize there are two very important
> football games going on right now; and we are happy you chose to spend the
> afternoon with us to celebrate our parents 50th wedding anniversary.
>  
> I¹ll start by stealing a quote from my mother-in-law, Diane Sollee, sitting
> right over there: ³Any fool can have a trophy wife, but it takes a real man to
> have a trophy marriage.²  I think my dad lucked out and got both  a trophy
> wife and a trophy marriage. 50 years  holy cow.  That¹s really hard to
> imagine.
>  
> Most of you probably don¹t know that not only have my parents been married 50
> years, but they have been together since they were 13 and 15 years old.  My
> mother has never had another boyfriend besides my dad.  When my sisters and I
> were younger, that fact really grossed us out  and we still find it a little
> suspect.  I mean ³Mom, really?  No other boyfriend?²  I look at my son and
> daughter who are almost 16 and my niece who is 14, and I cannot imagine them
> pairing up for life. It¹s even difficult to imagine for my 20-year-old nephew.
> But, I suppose things were different then; and when you find the love of your
> life you stick with that person.  I guess we should all be that lucky.
>  
> Way back 50 years ago, everyone got married. It¹s what you did.  No questions
> asked.  Today, not so much.  So you might ask, why do we get married?  What¹s
> the use?  Because, we need a witness to our lives.  There are a billion people
> on this planet.  What does any one life really mean?  But in a marriage,
> you¹re promising to care about everything.  The good things, the bad things,
> the terrible things, the mundane things.  All of it.  All the time, every day.
> You are saying, ³Your life will not go unnoticed, because I will notice it.
> Your life will not go unwitnessed, because I will be your witness.²
>  
> So how do you make it to 50 years? Well in our household the answer to that
> question was hunting and fishing.  Every weekend while we were growing up, our
> dad would leave on Saturday morning for a hunting or fishing trip.  The four
> girls would get up and watch Style with Elsa Klensch on CNN.  Then we would
> clean house, take showers and go shopping for the day  a little female
> bonding. On Sunday afternoon, dad would return, and the family would be whole
> again.  So, my tip to all you newly-marrieds is  find something you enjoy
> doing apart.  Do that thing, then come back together.  It certainly worked for
> my parents.
> 
> We often hear people say, ³Is there anything more beautiful than a young
> couple clasping hands, in love on the path of marriage? Can there be anything
> more beautiful than young love?²  And the answer is, "Yes, there is a
> more
beautiful thing. It is the spectacle of an old man and an old woman
> finishing their journey together on that path.  Their hands are gnarled, but
> still clasped; their faces are seamed, but still radiant.  Their hearts are
> physically bowed and tired, but still strong with love and devotion for one
> another. Yes, there is a more beautiful thing than young love. That thing is
> old love."
>  
> Let¹s welcome my parents.
>> ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>> 
>> - Save the Dates: NARME 2012 CONFERENCE: BALTIMORE, JULY 20-25
>> For details, http://www.narme.org/portal2/
>> See NARME Links and Clips updated daily at http://scoop.it/t/narme
>> 
>> ---------------------------------------
>> - Grant brings big money to college
>> Anna Claire Conrad
>> The Auburn Plainsman
>> Oct 20, 2011
>> 
>> (Thought you might find it interesting to read about one of the Marriage
>> Grant recipients in some detail and cheer them on for their progress.  Bravo
>> to this team. - diane)
>>   
>> Auburn¹s College of Human Sciences has been endowed with a three-year, $7.5
>> million grant to continue the promotion of the Alabama Healthy Marriage and
>> Relationship Education Initiative.
>> 
>> ³Since 2006, we had a five-year, $9.2 million grant,² said Roberta Jackel,
>> project manager for the AHMREI. ³When this grant transpired, we applied for
>> and was appropriated this new, three-year federal grant through the
>> Department of Health and Human Services.²
>> 
>> Jackel said this grant will be used to fund healthy relationship and marriage
>> education programs throughout Alabama.
>> 
>> ³We will host a series of classes that will be taught here in Lee County,²
>> Jackel said. ³Previously, through our last grant, these classes were only
>> taught by 10 partners scattered around the state.²
>> 
>> Francesca Adler-Baeder, professor of human development and family studies and
>> project director of the AHMREI, said these classes will be free because of
>> the grant.
>> 
>> Adler-Baeder also emphasized these programs are an educational outreach
>> resource at the community¹s disposal to better their marriages and
>> relationships, and they are in no way counseling sessions or interventions.
>> 
>> ³We believe that healthy relationship skills can be taught and that people
>> can learn better communication, conflict resolution and parenting skills
>> through these educational workshops,² Jackel said.
>> 
>> Rachel Parham, recent Auburn graduate in human development and family
>> studies, said the people who attend these classes thoroughly enjoy the
>> program, and, based on past progress, Lee County will greatly benefit from
>> this initiative.
>> 
>> ³For these next three years we will be providing on-campus educational
>> programs on maintaining healthy relationships,² Adler-Baeder said. ³These
>> classes will be made available through the continuing education program and,
>> perhaps, on different locations throughout the University.²
>> 
>> Jackel said Alabama has historically had a high divorce rate.
>> 
>> Adler-Baeder said when this organization first began its educational
>> initiative in 2006, Alabama was ranked as the state with the fifth-highest
>> divorce rate.
>> 
>> ³Since then, Alabama has dropped five places and is now ranked as the state
>> with the 10th highest divorce rate,² Adler-Baider said. ³It¹s these results
>> and the individual results we witness firsthand with our participants that
>> motivates us to continue this initiative.²
>> 
>> Parham said conflict within a marriage affects the entire family dynamic.
>> 
>> ³The children of the couples who attend these classes end up being happier
>> and more well-behaved  because they see that the example their parents are
>> setting for them,² Parham said.
>> 
>> Adler-Baeder said she looks forward to the Auburn community getting involved.
>> 
>> ³We¹ve seen through past programs with different junior high and high schools
>> around the area that the peers-teaching-peers method has helped our clients
>> immensely and that teens tend to learn better from a demographic they can
>> relate to,² Parham said.
>> 
> -------------------------------------------------------
> - FOR INFORMATION about how to post to the Smart Marriages® newslist;
> subscribe or UNSUBSCRIBE, or an archive of all past posts:
> http://www.smartmarriages.com/newslist.info.html

-------------- next part --------------
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
URL: <http://lists101.his.com/pipermail/smartmarriages/attachments/20111026/153a29fa/attachment.html>