Time Out for Marriage/ Love-Song Speak/ Science of Love / The Marrying Kind/ Marriage Documentary - 1/19/11

[Smartmarriages]

- TAKING TIME OFF FOR MARRIAGE (What a concept! - diane)
- LOVE SONG SPEAK 
- THE SCIENCE OF LOVE
- THE MARRYING KIND: BORN OR MADE?
- CANADIAN MARRIAGE DOCUMENTARY

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- TAKING TIME OFF FOR MARRIAGE (What a concept! - diane)
By Paula Szuchman
The Juggle: Wall Street Journal Blog
January 6, 2011

Some people take time off work to be with their children. Others take a
break to write a book or care for an ailing loved one or to volunteer in
Africa. But it¹s the rare person who steps off the treadmill to spend
quality time with a spouse.

. . . In a country where you¹re more likely to fail in your relationship
than you are to land a husband who works at KKR  <http://www.kkr.com/> or
end up with a serious disease, why isn¹t developing and growing your
personal relationships valued?

Here¹s one possible answer: Marriage itself isn¹t as valued as it once was.
(Work, meanwhile, is sacrosanct for many people.) A recent Time magazine/
Pew survey finds that nearly 40% of Americans think marriage is obsolete,
for instance. And since we have one of the world¹s highest rates of
remarriage, it might just be a given that if your marriage fails, you can
always find another one.

That said, who wouldn¹t want to follow Ms. Walker¹s lead and extend the
³honeymoon period²? It¹s so brief, yet so sweet.

For the full article:
http://blogs.wsj.com/juggle/2011/01/06/taking-time-off-for-marriage/
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- LOVE SONG SPEAK 
Deborah Rees has compiled 100 love songs into a book ³Get A Ways for Your
Married Life² that grew out of her years of MFT practice and an invitation
to teach marriage skills at a couples retreat in Jamaica.  It¹s a great
guidebook using songs and conversations starters to help couples get Œin the
zone¹ when they take time out for their marriage (see above); for weekly
date nights; to get back in the zone after a fight or growing apart; or,
whatever.  See more here: http://tinyurl.com/4mfv6d5
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- THE SCIENCE OF LOVE
 
Sue Johnson is conducting a marriage counselling study for Ottawa couples
using MRIs to monitor how the  brain responds
By Julie Beun, The Ottawa Citizen January 16, 2011

OTTAWA ‹ Sue Johnson doesn't look like a woman about to start a  revolution.
But fomenting a revolution she is -- at least when it  comes to the diverse
world of marriage counselling.

Based on 25 years of research into Emotionally Focused Therapy  (EFT),
Johnson is currently conducting a landmark study on about 30  troubled
Ottawa couples that is so "out there." The $150,000 study  has been funded
by the not-for-profit research arm of the Ottawa  Couple and Family
Institute, where Johnson is director.

Each couple received two functional MRIs (which make images of  brain
activity) and 20 sessions of EFT counselling, which identifies  key moments
in a relationship to build on attachments. The study  aims to do what no
other has achieved: prove once and for all that couples counselling not only
works, but actually changes the way the  human brain responds.

For the full article:
http://tinyurl.com/6xl4pau

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- THE MARRYING KIND: BORN OR MADE?
By PAMELA PAUL
January 14, 2011
The New York Times 

The Gist Nice men marry, and marriage makes men nice.          

The Source ³Does Marriage Inhibit Antisocial Behavior? An Examination of
Selection vs. Causation via a Longitudinal Twin Study,² by S. Alexandra
Burt, Archives of General Psychiatry, a publication of the American Medical
Association 

WOMEN have long been saddled with the onus of ³civilizing men.² According to
studies of varying reliability, once under the womanly wing of matrimony,
men work more, make more money, go to church more, eat more healthily and
drink less unhealthily. Sociologists refer to this as ³the marriage effect.²

But there has long been a niggling question: Is marriage responsible for
turning the beastly male into a well-behaved husband? Or are the upstanding
men the ones who marry in the first place? The debate is between selection
bias (men who marry are not misbehavers) and causation (married men don¹t
misbehave). According to a new study from Michigan State University, the
answer is a bit of both.
Full article:    http://tinyurl.com/4ck4rl8

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- CANADIAN MARRIAGE DOCUMENTARY

Thoroughly Modern Marriage
Tomorrow: Thursday Jan. 20 at 9 pm ET/PT on CBC Television's Doc Zone
With a royal wedding on the calendar, marriage is making headlines. Yet
there are more single people than married for the first time in Canadian
history, due to a high divorce rate and the popularity of common-law unions.
More of us are saying ³Why bother?² rather than ³I do².  Thoroughly Modern
Marriage examines our most fascinating social institution as it is today,
and asks: is it worth saving?  Couples welcome us into their homes to see a
range of very different marital relationships. Sociologists, historians and
neurologists from various parts of Canada and beyond explain what
constitutes a modern marriage - in society, in our homes, and even in our
brains.  And you'll see that religion and geography have a  hand in making
or breaking the institution.
View the trailer: 
http://bit.ly/Marriage_Trailer
More info on the documentary at CBC Doc Zone:
http://bit.ly/Thoroughly_Modern_Marriage
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