Gore / Ending A Marriage / New Marriage Prep book / Love Gospel-Hendrix / Little bit married /Adulthood - 6/16/10

Wed Jun 16 22:43:51 EDT 2010

- GORE IT TURNS OUT IS NOT HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH LAURIE DAVID
- IT ISN’T EASY TO END A MARRIAGE, AT ANY AGE
- All-in-One Marriage Prep
- The love gospel according to Harville Hendrix
- A LITTLE BIT MARRIED
- LONG ROAD TO ADULTHOOD IS GROWING EVEN LONGER
------------------------------------
- GORE IT TURNS OUT IS NOT HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH LAURIE DAVID
(As many of you wrote to say, I should know not to trust the tabloids. Maybe
the Gores will reunite....this report says they’re still hanging out.)

Laurie David told the Huffington Post on Tuesday that a tabloid report that
she is having an affair with Al Gore is an absolute lie.

"The story is completely untrue," David told Huffington Post. "It's a total
fabrication. I adore both Al and Tipper.  I look at them both as family.
And I have happily been in a serious relationship since my divorce."

Laurie and Larry David split in 2007.

Meanwhile a source close to the Gore family told Huffington Post, "Al and
Tipper are still very close and spending together time this summer with
their family."
--------------------------------
- IT ISN’T EASY TO END A MARRIAGE, AT ANY AGE
Commentary by Bruce Peterson and William Doherty
Minneapolis Star Tribune, June 16, 2010

A June 9 commentary by Deirdre Bair ("Divorces late in life usher in 'the
third age'") offered an upbeat view of the divorce of Al and Tipper Gore.

Divorces by the middle-aged and elderly are the fastest-growing, Bair said.
These courageous people view divorce not as failure but as an opportunity
for freedom and control over their lives. New companions are easy to find,
and few of these middle-aged divorcees have regrets, Bair added, so we
should not feel sad about the Gores.

Well, we're sad. . . . .

. . . . . Research shows that people act differently in a relationship where
the promise is "I am here as long as it's working for me" rather than "till
death do us part." The promise of lifelong fidelity transforms a live-in
relationship into a family -- the place where the security to reveal your
true self gives the only hope of truly seeing yourself. . .  .
For the FULL OP ED: http://tinyurl.com/3yn3dkl
--------------------------------------------
- All-in-One Marriage Prep
A bunch of Smart Marriage experts (Chapman, Van Epp, Haltzman, Heitler,
Morante, etc) are featured in a new book, All-in-One Marriage Prep: 75
Experts Share Tips and Wisdom to Help You Get Ready Now, which will be
available at the Smart Marriages Conference Combined Book Exhibit.  Buy it
at the conference or order it online:
http://www.allinonemarriageprep.com   Part of the proceeds will go to The
Dibble Institute for youth education.

---------------------------------------------------------------
- The love gospel according to Harville Hendrix
The Oprah-endorsed guru is determined to save the planet, one couple at a
time

Harville Hendrix pioneered the relationship therapy called Imago.
Michael Falco for The Globe and Mail (Canada)
June 11, 2010
For the full interview:
http://tinyurl.com/2e4w7sd

There is still space in the two-day Preconference training Institute with
Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt, in their Masters Session on Imago
Dialogue, and in their workshop on their newest teach-out-of-the-box program
A New Way to Love.  They’ll also be very available to chat about their new
crusade at their exhibit in the exhibit hall.

112 Two Days - Wednesday & Thursday, July 7 & 8
IMAGO: Couplehood Programs, Connects, & Conflict to Connection
 Harville Hendrix, PhD and Helen LaKelly Hunt, PhD
 Learn to coach couples using the transformative power of Imago Dialogue as
you qualify to teach
three programs: 9-hr Couplehood Programs (General, Christian & Jewish
versions); the 3-hr
IMAGOConnects; and "Through Conflict to Connection" 1 to 5 hr kit. For
congregations & communities.
$100 spouse discount. Click for more information:
http://www.smartmarriages.com/imago.html
<http://www.smartmarriages.com/imago.html>

401
IMAGO Dialogue
Harville Hendrix PhD, Helen LaKelly Hunt, PhD
Structured dialogue, the very core of the powerful
Imago model, helps couples learn to switch from
monologue to dialogue and from judgment to
curiosity and affirmation to make important
new love connections. Experiential.

505
A New Way to Love  – TOOB
Harville Hendrix, PhD, Helen LaKelly Hunt, PhD
This Imago faith-based course guides couples
in finding God's purpose for their marriage,
deepening their connection, and starting a
grass-roots movement of couples teaching couples.

-----------------------------------------------

- A LITTLE BIT MARRIED
. . . . In your book, you profile a couple that stayed together in a serious
relationships for eight years without getting married. Why stick together
for so long?

Seligson: There is this very powerful thing called the inertia theory: You
live together, and you form these bonds. People say when they break up,
"It's like a divorce." It's very hard to move out when you live together.
Also, part of it is complacency, and couples aren't always on the same page.
Someone is dating, and they are thinking this is a past agreement -- that we
are going to get married because we've been together for X years.

CNN: In your book, it sounds like communication is a key factor for
interpreting whether a relationship is headed for marriage. How can couples
communicate better?

Seligson: I was surprised how little communication there was between
couples. You need to ask yourself: What does it mean when you move in
together? 

CNN: Some people believe cohabitation before marriage can affect the chances
of marriage. What are your thoughts?

Seligson: Sure there is the saying, "Don't buy the cow when you can get the
milk for free." I live with my boyfriend, and I don't think he perceives
he's getting free milk. It's a personal decision. The idea of being afraid
to move in implies men don't want to get married and that's wholeheartedly
incorrect. Men do want to get married. They are just on a different time
frame. If you want to move in with your boyfriend, discuss what it means be
on the same page about it.

CNN: So men do want to get married?

Seligson: Men do want to get married. It's just that the timing that's
different. A man's decision to get married is often correlated to income. I
heard this from many men that they want to be able to provide. Men want to
feel they are in a financially stable position before they get married. If
you look at career rhythms of young people, it takes a long time to get it
together.

And so on......just so you see what’s out there.  Here’s the full piece on
CNN: 
http://tinyurl.com/2v4x8v8

For the latest update on Cohabitation research, attend the Friday afternoon
It Takes A Village Keynote by John Van Epp and the Friday afternoon Scott
Stanley workshop: 

303
Dating and Cohabiting Couples
Scott Stanley, PhD
The latest research on relationship formation and
commitment identifies the most effective ways to
recruit and work with dating and cohabiting couples
and singles to impact their future marital success.
------------------------------------------
* LONG ROAD TO ADULTHOOD IS GROWING EVEN LONGER
New York Times/June 11

. . . . a growing body of research shows that the real Peter Pans are not
the boomers, but the generations that have followed. For many, by choice or
circumstance, independence no longer begins at 21.  . . .

. . . . “The longer I waited to get married, the more reticent I became,”
she said. She and her fiancé want children, but feel they are not yet ready.
“We’re both nervous about what would be lost,” she said.

More schooling has meant that children have to rely on financial support
from their parents. Adults between 18 and 34 received an average of $38,000
in cash and two years’ worth of full-time labor from their parents, or about
10 percent of their income, <http://www.transad.pop.upenn.edu/index.html>
according to the MacArthur network.

Figures on how much parents spent 20 or 30 years ago are scarce, but Mr.
Furstenberg said new research that he and a colleague, Sabino Kornrich, are
working on shows that “prior to the 1990s, parents appeared to invest most
in children in their teen years.

In the late 1990s, however, parents’ spending patterns began to shift so
that the flow of money was greatest when their children were either very
young or in their mid-20s.”

More people in their 20s are also living with their parents. About
one-fourth of 25-year-old white men lived at home in 2007  before the
latest recession  compared with one-fifth in 2000 and less than one-eighth
in 1970.

FULL Article: http://tinyurl.com/2v8jogx

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