JON AND KATE PLUS EIGHT - AUUUUUUGH - 5/23/09

[Smartmarriages]

- JON AND KATE PLUS EIGHT - AUUUUUUGH

I'm depressed. I recorded last night's Jon/Kate debacle and just watched it.
I'm close to tears - convinced their stupid rationalization *the kids will
be better off to have clam - it's not good for them to see us fighting and
everything will be just fine, we're doing this FOR the kids - it's all FOR
the good of the kids* - i'm convinced this baloney will lead to copy-cat
divorces all over the world.  Auuuugh.  I was thinking about switching to a
red suit in Orlando but now I have to stick to black.  I'm in mourning.

Please contact your local media, blog, write columns - do what you can to
counter this horrible message.

What are they teaching those eight about throwing in the towel?

> Example is not the main thing in influencing others. It is the only thing.
> Albert Schweitzer


> Marriages of the children of divorce have a much higher rate of divorce than
> the marriages of children from intact families.  A major reason for this . .
> is that children learn about marital commitment or permanence by observing
> their parents. In the children of divorce, the sense of commitment to a
> lifelong marriage has been undermined. - 10 Myths of Divorce, National
> Marriage Project 

And, as Jon kept saying....I'm only 32, I don't know what's coming.  We KNOW
what's coming Jon & Stepmother Plus Eight......

> And, when it comes to the kids, it's not just single unwed mothers whose kids
> struggle. "Most researchers reported that STEPCHILDREN were similar to
> children living with single mothers on the preponderance of outcome measures
> and that stepchildren were at greater risk for problems than were children
> living with both of their married parents." - The Journal of Marriage and
> Family

Lots of resources here Before you Divorce, like these:

> Each divorce is the death of a small civilization.
> Pat Conroy

> Bad marriages don't cause infidelity; infidelity causes bad marriages.
> Frank Pittman

> Our research estimates that 55-60% of marriages that end in divorce fall into
> the category of "good enough marriages". These marriages appear to be
> functioning well only a year or so prior to the divorce. From a child's
> perspective, these divorce are unexpected, inexplicable, and unwelcome and are
> thus most likely to harm children. These marriages are significantly more
> likely to divorce because of infidelity, citing explanations of "drifting
> apart" or "communication problems". They are unlikely to mention abuse because
> these were not highly conflicted marriages.  - Paul Amato, Smart Marriages
> keynote 

> Money often costs too much.
> Ralph Waldo Emerson

> Divorce causes a decrease in wealth that is larger than just splitting a
> couple¹s assets in half. Divorce drops a person's wealth by an average of 77%.
> And, contrary to popular belief, the research shows that the wealth status of
> divorced men wasn¹t significantly better than that of divorced women, in terms
> of real money. Divorce devastates your wealth. By the same token, married
> people see an increase in wealth that is more than just adding the assets of
> two single people. If you really want to increase your wealth, get married and
> stay married. - Jay Zagorsky, Ohio State, Journal of Sociology, Jan 2006


> The Top Ten Myths of Divorce - by David Popenoe
> http://marriage.rutgers.edu/Publications/pubtoptenmyths.htm

Send people here and to the conference where we can stop this kind of family
destroying baloney:
http://www.smartmarriages.com/before.breakup.html


Diane Sollee, Director
Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education, LLC (CMFCE)
5310 Belt Rd NW,   
Washington, DC 20015
www.smartmarriages.com
202-362-3332  
diane at smartmarriages.com

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