SBF seeking Marriage - 1/17/09

[Smartmarriages]

- Yes We Can


> Count me among the throngs ready to grab a piece of the new black American
> dream, including a side of MARRIAGE and babies with that high-powered career.

>  . . . ³we are witnessing a sociological paradigm shift where a loving black
> NUCLEAR FAMILY is the new definition of cool.² .  . .

> Another, perhaps surprising, side effect of the search for one¹s very own
> Barack Obama is the actual shrinking of expectations among black women. The
> 44th president of the United States, after all, started his political career
> as a community organizer. Today he¹d be making around $30,000 a year,
> according to Salary.com.
> 
> ³Michelle met Barack when he was Œlow¹ on the totem pole,² said Naima. ³He had
> a studio apartment and a beat-up car, but they clearly saw the potential in
> each other.²

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SBF Seeking Her Own Barack
By Saaret
Created 01/16/2009 - 12:31

SBF Seeking Her Own Barack
The inauguration weekend will be the biggest buppie meet market of all time.
helena.andrews

The planning started soon after Election Night. And now the hopes of young,
single black men and women are pinned to inauguration week. The goal for the
degreed and pedigreed: to find their very own Barack or Michelle.
The inauguration weekend will be the biggest buppie meet market of all time.
01/17/2009 08:12

When searching for those adjectives that best capture the inauguration of
the nation¹s first black president, old standards come to mind‹³historic!²
³momentous!² ³unprecedented!²

Add to that venerable list ³intellectual Freaknik" and ³meet market for
buppies,² because among the millions attending this weekend¹s revelry are
plenty of single, young black men and women looking to hook up while
witnessing history.

The plans started to come together by midday on Nov. 5, 2008. Plane tickets
were bought. Ball gowns were fitted. And hopes were pinned like wilted
corsages to the big event ,where degreed and pedigreed black folks, raised
on the impossible standard of The Cosby Show, might find their very own
Barack or Michelle, real-life incarnations of every Œ80s baby¹s fantasy.

One of my good friends, Bari, has ingeniously dubbed the days surrounding
Barack Obama¹s swearing-in ³Freaknik for Folks with Degrees,² a nod to the
massive gatherings of black college students that took place in 1990s
Atlanta. Bari, who has a BA, MBA and JD behind her name and a ³Mrs.² in
front of it, sees the Obamas as ³the standard-bearers for black love.² She
wished everyone Godspeed this weekend.

Dru, another friend, said ³If anything, Obama gives every dude an easy
pick-up line this weekend.² We can only imagine what that might be,
something like: ³Hey, wanna take a look at my economic stimulus package?²

Thankfully, most are optimistic that ³the Œnaug² will turn out to be more
than just All-Star Weekend with graduates instead of groupies.

Leave it to my buddy, Faraji, who¹s earning a master¹s degree from MIT and
fancies himself hilarious, to analyze the situation this way: ³Many
professional blacks are optimistic about the prospects of attending a mass
event where they can network, meet potential mates and enjoy themselves
unencumbered by street fights, shootings and packs of young hooligans in
Coogi sweaters harassing women.²

Despite the fact that it was Cosby that made Coogi the sartorial symbol of
black elite back in the Œ80s, for most the standard will be a little bit
higher this coming weekend.

Andrea, an investment banker traveling from London, described this year¹s
inauguration as ³the can¹t-miss black networking event of the century.²
Everybody who¹s anybody‹or those wishing to be somebody‹will be there, she
said.

³And if I¹m honest with myself,² added Mitchell, ³I¹m attending because a
tiny piece of the little angel sitting on my shoulder is hoping that in D.C.
there is anybody, somebodyŠ for me.²

Her friend, Naima, a doctoral candidate at the University of California at
Los Angeles, is preparing for the best. ³I¹m putting a little more effort
into my outfits, a little more thought into what parties I go to and I am
doing a few more sit-ups,² she said.

Count me among the throngs ready to grab a piece of the new black American
dream, including a side of marriage and babies with that high-powered
career.

Once it was clear that the next first lady would be Mrs. Obama, my own
prospects seemed that much more promising. As my best friend, Gina, puts it
³Michelle is making it super famous to be a black woman² with an advanced
degree. Now it seems we have an Excel spreadsheet packed with potential
opportunities‹a happy hour here, a champagne brunch there.

And although the practice of using black professional mixers, conferences
and conventions as a sort of dating voir dire is nothing new‹at least in
today¹s climate of dipping marriage rates‹the Obamas have raised the stakes
considerably.

According to Andrea, ³we are witnessing a sociological paradigm shift where
a loving black nuclear family is the new definition of cool.²

The hope for Andrea and women like her is that the crowd of eligible and
educated black men in Washington this weekend ³will be reminded that smart,
driven, nurturing black women have always been‹and will always be‹the
business.²

Another, perhaps surprising, side effect of the search for one¹s very own
Barack Obama is the actual shrinking of expectations among black women. The
44th president of the United States, after all, started his political career
as a community organizer. Today he¹d be making around $30,000 a year,
according to Salary.com.

³Michelle met Barack when he was Œlow¹ on the totem pole,² said Naima. ³He
had a studio apartment and a beat-up car, but they clearly saw the potential
in each other.²

If it¹s potential that people are looking for this weekend, there will be
plenty‹ finding it won¹t be the problem, recognizing it might be.

Helena Andrews is a regular contributor to The Root.

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