First Dance/Strong Marriages Fla/Tech Blooming/Films/Rural Marriage/Energizing #s/Comedy/ YUK -2/3/09

[Smartmarriages]

- BRIDAL FAIR: FIRST DANCE
- STRONG MARRIAGES FLORIDA
- TECHNOLOGY 
- MARRIAGE MOVIES IN ORLANDO
- CONFERENCE: RELATIONSHIP EDUCATION IN RURAL COMMUNITIES
- ENERGIZING VALENTINE NUMBERS!!
- VALENTINE'S DAY COMEDY - COUPLES WANTED
- WILDLY SUCCESSFUL ADULTERY WEBSITE AND THE SUPERBOWL

############################

- BRIDAL FAIR: FIRST DANCE

I meant to include this poster from the Texas Bridal Fair, full of good
ideas ya'll can *borrow*:
http://ido.wevownow.com/

Click on The First Dance to see the poster pdf.

################################
- STRONG MARRIAGES FLORIDA

Floridians, check out this new campaign!  They're holding a press conference
today in Tallahassee on proposed marriage education legislation; they'll
host a Florida Only Networking meeting at Smart Marriages Orlando; and who
knows what else between now and then.  I'll keep you posted.     -diane

http://www.yes2marriage.org/

################################
- TECHNOLOGY 

Look at what Jason Krafsky has created on his Marriage Junkie Blog.....the
technology gets more amazing every day.....blows my mind what the tech
cowboys can do! 

http://tinyurl.com/d7a93q

And, speaking of cowboys, Marc Payan will host a Marriage Tech swap meet
Thurs in Orlando; a Marriage Tech Boot Camp workshop; will co-present the
Marketing keynote Sat night; AND will host a Marriage Tech Exhibit - all to
try to help get us all up on the horse.  - diane

################################

- MARRIAGE MOVIES IN ORLANDO
Yes, we will repeat the Marriage Film Festival in Orlando, and, yes, you
will get to see Fireproof as well as a bunch of other great films.  There is
an ever-so-tentative schedule posted on the website but the only thing for
sure about it is: *it will change*.  Films are free, included in your
registration.  - http://www.smartmarriages.com/film.festival.html

###################################
- CONFERENCE: RELATIONSHIP EDUCATION IN RURAL COMMUNITIES
Call for Submissions
Springfield, Missouri
 
This 6th annual conference sponsored by the School of Professional
Psychology at Forest Institute continues its effort to educate SW Missouri
about the importance of healthy marriages and relationships and also invites
all educators and administrators across the country who are working in rural
areas, where the logistics of relationship education are a bit different
from urban environments to attend.
  
Proposals for posters and presentations will be accepted through March 31,
2009. For more information, visit:
http://www.operationus.org/latest/proposals2009.html

##################################
- ENERGIZING VALENTINE NUMBERS!!  WOW.

> Diane,  
> Here in Oklahoma, we are gearing up for our annual large-scale couple events.
> This year, our workshops are titled ³Forever. For Real.² and will be held in
> both Oklahoma City and Tulsa on February 7th.  We are experiencing a
> phenomenal response, with OKC registrations currently at 1,630 (ppl.) and
> Tulsa registrations at 675 (ppl.).  And, the phone keeps ringing!  This will
> be an amazing day for the Oklahoma Marriage Initiative, as well as for the
> hundreds of couples who will receive valuable marriage education.  Just wanted
> to pass this along to you, as I know you are energized by these kinds of
> updates from the field.
> Kendy Cox

#######################################

- VALENTINE'S DAY COMEDY - COUPLES WANTED

Has anyone ever seen/heard of this? If so, let me know.  I'd love to see
this one.  PS, I'm going to see Malcolm Gladwell live and in person Thurs
night. Excited!  I hope you've all read OUTLIERS by now. My fantasy is to
get him to write about marriage education. I know, dream on....but we gotta
have a dream.    - diane


VALENTINE'S DAY SPECIAL SHOW
Sat. Feb 14th @ 7:30 & 9:45 p.m.
Couples still needed!

House of Cards is our original production where select couples in the
audience get to see their lives together presented on stage by our talented
cast.  

In the first half of the show, we will play out important scenes from their
lives: past relationships, first meeting, embarrassing moments, etc. The
show will be complete with songs, inner monologues, and all the anxiety and
despair associated with the mating ritual.
 
In the second half of the show, we get to see the other side of
relationships, as one spouse will have the opportunity to sue the other for
any of a variety of issues.  We have had a wife sue her husband because he
wanted to build their furniture, rather than buy new stuff.  A guy sued his
girlfriend because she couldn't make a good sandwich.  No issue is off
limits to present your pet peeve about your significant other in public.
 
We will supply attorneys for both sides, as well as the judge and assorted
witnesses.  This is your chance to air your grievance in a public forum, and
affect a positive change in your relationship.* (*Not responsible for
permanent damage)

We are still looking for two couples to share your story with us -
specifically for the Comedy Court. If you would like to file a suit against
your significant other, email us your story
<mailto:info at manhattancomedy.com?subject=House%20of%20Cards%20Couple> .  We
will choose the best story to incorporate into our show that evening.

If your story is chosen, you will receive 4 tickets to the show, front row
seats to the action as well as drinks and the admiration of all.

Even if you are not interested in sharing your story, don't miss this
fantastic show on Saturday, February 14th at 7:30 & 9:45 p.m.

We hope to hear from you, and look forward to the show!
 
Best wishes,
The Cast & Crew of the National Comedy Theatre
347 W. 36th St. &bull Manhattan &bull 212.629.5202
Shows: Fridays & Saturdays @ 7:30 & 9:45 p.m.
For reservations, click here
<http://click.icptrack.com/icp/relay.php?r=48429080&msgid=630777&act=4TEY&c=
324875&admin=0&destination=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.manhattancomedy.com%2Fnctperf.ht
ml> 

 #####################################
- WILDLY SUCCESSFUL ADULTERY WEBSITE AND THE SUPERBOWL

I think we should all write NBC and the NFL and THANK them for their
decision. If someone can find the appropriate web addresses, share them.
This deserves our time.

But, watch out Texas! This can undo much of the good work of the Texas
Marriage Education/1% Solution Legislation. What's galling is that it's
presented under the guise of being somehow noble because it's about BEING
HONEST.  Give me a break. I guess they want to prove everything is bigger in
Texas ­ even the divorce rate.

If someone can send the website for the lowdown texas decision makers, send
it.  - diane 


Pitch for adultery finds Houston market
By CLAUDIA FELDMAN 
HOUSTON CHRONICLE
Feb. 2, 2009 

A scene from the Ashley Madison commercial shown during Super Bowl XLIII in
Texas.

Football fans are used to outrageous ads on Super Bowl Sunday, but a
30-second pitch for adultery had Monday-morning quarterbacks buzzing.

³Infidelity is a form of betrayal, and the idea of portraying betrayal as an
answer to relationship problems is mind-boggling,² said family therapist Tim
Louis in Houston.

He was referring to the $250,000 spot for AshleyMadison.com, an online
dating service for married folk.

The ad, deemed inappropriate by NFL and NBC officials, ran only in Texas. It
showed a couple celebrating their anniversary at a white tablecloth
restaurant. The man blew his nose, answered his cell phone, then stood up to
leave in the middle of dessert.

³Happy anniversary, honey,² he said on his way out.

Then came the voice-over, speaking to women: ³Isn¹t it time for
AshleyMadison.com?²

Louis was emphatic that the answer is no.

³The reality is many people do have affairs, but they only create additional
problems between husbands and wives,² he said. ³There¹s nothing like a big
old secret ‹ and guilt and fear ‹ that further isolates you from your
partner.²

AshleyMadison.com CEO Noel Biderman said he started the service in 2001,
after reading that 30 percent of the people signing up for singles dating
services were actually married.

³I thought, wouldn¹t it be better to be honest about your status?² he said.
³About 3.3 million members and tens of millions of dollars later, I think I
was right.²

Today, the Toronto-based company is focusing on Texas because Houston,
Dallas and San Antonio represent its fastest-growing markets.

³We¹ve had close to a quarter-million members join in the past few months,²
Biderman said.

Financial decision

Despite the ban on his Super Bowl ad by the NFL and NBC, he said local
stations found it made financial sense to air the spot.

³The effects of the current recession are so profound that many local
stations were willing to accept Ashley Madison advertising dollars even in
this post-wardrobe-malfunction Super Bowl climate,² he said.

It was a bonanza for Ashley Madison, too. By Monday afternoon, the Web site
had received 147,000 hits from the Houston market alone.

The Rev. Randy White, senior pastor at First Baptist Church of Katy,
described the ad as ³despicable² and ³a new low on the assault of marriage,
the foundation of our society.²

He wanted to know who approved it at the local level.

One local user, Sondra Cole, defended the site.

The single, 41-year-old nurse says she signed up three years ago because she
already was involved with married men.

³Right now, I just don¹t want to compromise with anybody,² Cole said. ³Men
have to play by my rules, and when I say it¹s time for them to go, they have
to go. But I do enjoy the closeness and the communication. I had one come to
me and tell me he had cancer. He hadn¹t told anybody in his family or his
boss. I¹m glad he could confide in me.²

Another AshleyMadison.com customer, who identified himself as Mike, said his
extramarital relationship made him feel attractive again.

It also made him realize he loves his wife and children and does not want to
be separated or divorced. He¹s quit trolling for dates online, he says.

That is good news for the Rev. Anthony Giampietro, chairman of the
philosophy department at the University of St. Thomas. He acknowledges that
while many couples find themselves in unhappy relationships, extramarital
sex is hardly the answer.

Marriage takes work

Instead, he says, couples have to understand that the best things in life
take work, that couples can maintain good relationships for 40 and 50 and 60
years and that they can do it.

Louis, the family therapist, offers a simple invitation to struggling
couples. He works for Family Services of Greater Houston, a group that
receives state and federal funds to offer free, marriage education
workshops.

³We focus on skills of communication and conflict resolution with the aim of
making relationships more satisfying,² Louis said. ³Please come. The classes
are offered in English, Spanish and Chinese.²
 
http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/chronicle/6243271.html

####################
Do not hit "reply" to respond to this email. This mailbox is not monitored
and you will not receive a response.

Instead, create a new email and send submissions and comments to moderator,
Diane Sollee: diane at smartmarriages.com  (In other words, do NOT simply hit
"reply". If you hit reply your email will disappear into cyberspace.)

This is a moderated list. All submissions are read by Diane Sollee. Please
indicate if your comment is NOT to be shared with the list.  PLEASE include
your email address and/or url as part of your signature. With thousands of
subscribers, not all comments can be shared.

Also realize that opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by members
of the Coalition.

To SUBSCRIBE, UNSUBSCRIBE, or Change your subscription address,
visit: http://www.smartmarriages.com/app/Newsletter.Subscribe

To read past posts to the listserv, visit the Archive at:
http://lists101.his.com/pipermail/smartmarriages/

13th Annual Smart Marriages® Conference, Shingle Creek Resort,
Orlando, Florida, July 6-12, 2009 (General Conference July 8-11)
Pre-Conference Training Institutes July 6-8
Post-Conference Training Institutes July 12
 
Shingle Creek Resort: http://www.rosenshinglecreek.com/

Conference schedule, registration, & exhibit information:
http://www.smartmarriages.com/conferencedetails.html

List your program and resources on the Directory of Classes at
http://www.smartmarriages.com/directory_browse.html

Order conference audio & video CD/DVD/MP3s: 800-241-7785 or
http://www.iPlaybackSmartMarriages.com

Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education, LLC (CMFCE)
Diane Sollee, Director
5310 Belt Rd NW, Washington, DC 20015-1961
http://www.smartmarriages.com
202-362-3332

FAIR USE NOTICE: This e-newsletter/site contains copyrighted material the
use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright
owner. We make such material available in our efforts to advance
understanding of marriage, family, couples, divorce, legislation, family
breakdown, etc. We understand this constitutes a 'fair use' of such material
as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with
Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed
without profit to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the
included information for research and educational purposes. For more
information: http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/17/107.shtml. If you wish to
use copyrighted material from this site for purposes of your own that go
beyond 'fair use', you must obtain permission from the copyright owner.