Sue Johnson - Hold Me Tight - 4/22/09

[Smartmarriages]

- SUE JOHNSON - HOLD ME TIGHT


I know you are all looking forward to Sue Johnson's Hold Me Tight Saturday
morning keynote and that many of you are also planning to spend a full day
with her training in her NEW Hold Me Tight program Sunday in which she will
--tah dah!! - launch her new Hold Me Tight education program.   BE THE FIRST
to take it home with you: Hold Me Tight as a DVD-based program with
facilitator's guide.  Help spread the word.  The keynote is Sat July 11 at
8:30am and the training Sunday, July 12, 8:30am - 5:30pm.  - diane

> 904 One Day - Sunday, July 12
> Hold Me Tight: Strengthening the Bonds of Love
> Sue Johnson, EdD
> Understand the exquisite logic of love ­ the concept of "effective
> dependency"; the cycles that sabotage a felt sense of connection; the music of
> the relationship dance; and, finally, how to shape conversations that will
> foster a secure lasting bond between partners. $50 spouse discount. Click for
> more information: http://www.smartmarriages.com/eft.html
> 
Also, please do assure the public that they are warmly welcomed to the
institute.  In fact see the click for more info link above - couples say it
changed their life.

To whet your appetite further, here are excerpts from an article covering a
recent Sue Johnson keynote:

 --------------------------------

The Washington Times
April 12, 2009
Love and compassion needed to survive
Cheryl Wetzstein


. . .  If love relationships are all-important to people, why are they so
hard to keep alive and well? . . . .

Bottom line, as our understanding of love grows, we should become more
competent in expressing and maintaining it in our intimate, familial and
personal relationships. This, in turn, should reduce both family breakdown
and the terrible loneliness that is spreading like a cancer through American
society. . . .

Ms. Sue Johnson is a clinical psychologist based in Ottawa. She is known for
her lively English accent, clever stories about love and her co-development
of a successful approach to couples therapy, called Emotionally Focused
Therapy (EFT).

Ms. Johnson wrote a book last year called "Hold Me Tight: Seven
Conversations for a Lifetime of Love," to help struggling couples pull
themselves out of their relationship hells.

Her advice to couples can be summarized like this:

First, understand both of you have an inborn and lifelong need to be seen,
touched, recognized and comforted by others.

Love is "absolutely primary Š it's a survival code," Ms. Johnson told me
recently. All people long for a "loving responsiveness from other people,"
whereas isolation is traumatizing at any age, she said.

Second, understand that at the bottom of each argument, each rejection, each
nasty comment is a frustrated desire to connect or reconnect.

When couples feel distant from each other, it's like "emotional starvation,"
Ms. Johnson said. If people sense they are losing the source of their
emotional sustenance, panic sets in and they desperately try to regain it.

Unfortunately, she said, men and women often turn to counterproductive ways
to re-establish connection ‹ clinging, stonewalling, attacking, defending,
nagging, hiding. The result is even more distance and disconnection, she
wrote.

EFT, however, introduces couples to "effective dependency" and shows them
that as they learn to hear their mutual pleas for closeness, safety and
affirmation, their love relationships will heal, deepen and thrive. Even the
joy of sex can return.

EFT has a better-than-70 percent recovery rate in less than 12 sessions with
couples, according to research.

The importance of learning how to nurture love cannot be overestimated,
"because our societies are getting lonelier and lonelier," she said.

The Dalai Lama said it well, Ms. Johnson added, quoting the Tibetan Buddhist
leader: "Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them,
humanity cannot survive."

 See the full article: http://tinyurl.com/cfxunj

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13th Annual Smart Marriages® Conference, The Shingle Creek,
Orlando, Florida, July 6-12, 2009 (General Conference July 8-11)
Pre-Conference Training Institutes July 6-8
Post-Conference Training Institutes July 12
 
Shingle Creek: http://www.rosenshinglecreek.com/

To download a Conference brochure, register online, or for Exhibit
information:
http://www.smartmarriages.com/conferencedetails.html

List your program and resources on the Directory of Classes at
http://www.smartmarriages.com/directory_browse.html

Order conference audio & video CD/DVD/MP3s: 800-241-7785 or
http://www.iPlaybackSmartMarriages.com

Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education, LLC (CMFCE)
Diane Sollee, Director
5310 Belt Rd NW, Washington, DC 20015-1961
http://www.smartmarriages.com
202-362-3332

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