Nisa on NPR / Marrying for Money / Kids and Learning Trouble - 5/18/08

[Smartmarriages]

- NISA MUHAMMAD: TUNE INTO NPR MONDAY MAY 19, 2008
- MARRYING FOR MONEY
- SEPARATION FROM MOM, DAD LINKED WITH LEARNING TROUBLE
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- NISA MUHAMMAD: TUNE INTO NPR MONDAY MAY 19, 2008

Nisa Muhammad who is quoted in the article below will be on NPR NEWS AND
NOTES tomorrow, Monday, 1pm EST.  Check your local listings.  Nisa,
recipient of the 2007 Smart Impact Award for her pioneering work in founding
Black Marriage Day, will present four times in San Francisco including a
two-day training institute on the Basic Training curriculum:

> 112 Two Days - Tuesday & Wednesday, July 1 & 2
> Basic Training for Couples and Singles
> Rozario Slack, DMin, Nisa Muhammad
> Learn to teach two programs to help couples and singles in the Black community
> understand the benefits of marriage, communicate better, manage their conflict
> and increase their intimacy. Includes presentation and marketing skills and
> materials. $100 spouse discount. Click for more information:
> http://www.smartmarriages.com/black.html

- MARRYING FOR MONEY
Black Enterprise
March 2008
Sheryl Nance Nash  
 
The path to greater wealth may start with making a commitment--of the
romantic kind 

SINGLE PEOPLE BUY THEIR OWN china. It's one of the financial realities of
life as a single person--no bridal registry. Of course, marriage is about
far more than new bath towels and small appliances. When two people say "I
do," all sorts of good things can happen. Studies show that married people
are healthier, happier, and tend to be better off financially. "Marriage
increases African American wealth by about 50% over single respondents, and
each year of marriage pushes wealth up by an additional 4%," says Jay
Zagorsky, author of Marriage and Divorce's Impact on Wealth, a study
released by the Center for Human Resource Research at Ohio State University.

Indeed, the proof of the financial implications of marriage is simple
mathematics. Studies show that African American men who are married make
more money and are seen as more responsible and dedicated to their jobs,
says Nisa Islam Muhammad, executive director of the Washington, D.C.-based
Wedded Bliss Foundation, a national initiative to promote marriage in the
black community. She says that the children of married couples tend to do
better financially as well, creating a legacy of wealth. "Most of the black
students that go to Ivy League [or other] elite college and universities
come from two-parent families," Islam Muhammad says.

In fact, income figures raise eyebrows. "Statistics show family incomes of
black single parents grew when they married," says Clarence Shuler,
president and CEO of Building Lasting Relationships, a nonprofit based in
Colorado Springs, Colorado. And this financial benefit stems from more than
consolidating monthly expenses to free up more money to save. For instance,
when one spouse makes significantly more than the other, there is a
substantial tax savings for filing jointly. In terms of estate planning,
many states allow some or all of the assets of one spouse to pass to the
other without a will and without a tax consequence.

It's enough to make you want to take a walk down the aisle. The potential
for economic advantage has given rise to programs targeted to couples--some
specifically for African Americans--to strengthen families on all levels.
Because financial matters are major contributors to divorce there's momentum
for programs with a special interest in finances. You can find, among
others, nonprofits, faith-based organizations, and government-sponsored
programs that can guide a family's path toward prosperity.

What's more, spouses are automatically the beneficiary of each other's
retirement accounts unless otherwise stated, says Ginita Wall, a certified
financial planner in San Diego. Couples also benefit from additional
flexibility because they can transfer unlimited amounts of funds and assets
to each other without having to file gift tax returns, unlike unmarried
couples who make transfers of more than $12,000 a year.

TIME TO OPEN AN ACCOUNT?

"Whenever I heard about programs for first-time homebuyers or saw anyone
getting assistance for home renovations, it seemed to be someone who was
low-income," says Capucine Scott Carrington. "We are in the middle; we
didn't have enough money to purchase a house but made too much money to get
help."

But Capucine, 31, found that doing some additional digging paid off. Last
September, she and husband Gary, 39, moved into a $200,000, two-bedroom,
one-bath condo in Washington, D.C., after participating in the Marriage
Development Account program.

Their homeownership plans began a year earlier when they relocated from
North Carolina. Although Gary is now a merchandiser with Macy's, he
initially found it tough to find work. Still, the couple wanted to move
ahead with their personal goals. In the end, the tough job market turned out
to be a blessing of sorts: With just Capucine's salary of about $50,000, the
couple qualified for a Marriage Development Account with the nonprofit
Capital Area Asset Building Corp. (CAAB). Limited to Washington, D.C.,
residents, the accounts are part of a savings program for engaged and
married couples to help eliminate debt and build wealth through long-term
investments, such as purchasing a home. Couples commit to saving a set
amount each month, which is matched at a rate of $3 for every $1 in personal
savings. The Carringtons committed to saving $500 a month to reach their
goal.

"We cut back on going to the movies, to dinner, clothes shopping, and
traveling," Capucine says. "It was stressful with [Gary] not working. We
were pushed to the limit." Gary adds: "It was a strain on our marriage at
times because I couldn't provide for her the way I wanted. I'm thankful the
Lord saw us through."

After four months, the Carringtons had a total of $3,000 saved, and they
received $9,000 in matching funds. Shortly thereafter, they bought their
condo. Another advantage, Capucine says, were the mandatory money-management
classes. Couples must complete 10 hours of course work on topics including
budgeting, credit management, financial goal setting, and training related
to homeownership.

In the end, the couple says that the experience has strengthened their
relationship. "We know we can get through whatever situations come up,"
Capucine says. When you sacrifice and reach your goal, you get revved up. I
was always more of a saver, but [now] Gary is more open to saving. He
appreciates this in me now, instead of just thinking I'm frugal. We feel
like we're on our way."

Like many couples, the Carringtons say they didn't think about the financial
implications of getting married. Tax writeoffs were the last of their
concerns. "We didn't realize the financial potential we had as a couple
until we were married," Gary says. "When you're married, you have two ideas,
two incomes, it's two becoming one, and you get ahead."

HELP IS OUT THERE

Marriage Development Accounts are supported in part by federal funds. The
program began in 2006 under the direction of Sen. Sam Brownback (R-Kan.).
According to the senator's office, about 100 couples have opened accounts,
with about $400,000 in matching funds from the government; additional
support comes from private institutions. Though federal funding for the
program was trimmed in 2007, Colleen Dailey, executive director of CAAB,
says private sources have made up the difference. "We may not be able to
maintain the generous match rate of 3:1 on up to $3,000 over the long term,"
she says, "but we plan to continue offering Marriage Development Accounts."

Because homeownership is widely viewed as the foundation for building
wealth--and accounts for some 32.3% of the average household's net
worth--there are several agencies across the country that focus on
strengthening families and are also housing counseling agencies certified by
the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development. One such program is
the National African American Relationships Institute
(www.aarelationshipsinstitute.com <http://www.aarelationshipsinstitute.com/>
), co-founded by Patricia Dixon, an associate professor of African American
Studies at Georgia State University. "Our organization teaches potential
home buyers about budget, credit, and other information necessary for
purchasing a home," Dixon says. "This is typically the biggest investment
for the average family and is the primary way in which families can begin to
build wealth."

Many faith-based groups are promoting strong marriages with financial
literacy classes and workshops for couples. Michelle Singletary, syndicated
national columnist for The Washington Post, conducts workshops in the
religious community at places such as First Baptist Church of Glenarden in
Upper Marlboro, Maryland, and Christ is King Worship Center in Baltimore,
among others. Some churches, such as New Birth South Metropolitan Church of
Jonesboro, Georgia, have marriage ministries that include working to empower
families financially.

Tannia Benefield and her husband, Terry Likens, recently finished a 13-week
"Financial Peace University" workshop offered by syndicated radio host Dave
Ramsey. The couple joined many others at the Overlake Christian Church in
Redmond, Washington, all in an effort to tackle their biggest problem--debt.
"We started the debt snowball, paying off debt, got extra jobs to pay off
more, and we've begun to buy big-ticket items with cash and pay less for
them," Benefield says. The Seattle couple paid off more than $5,000 of their
$20,000 debt load in about two months. While they are trying to get current
on their bills, they feel victorious. "This has brought us closer together,"
Benefield says. "We talk more about the finances, and my husband and I don't
keep any financial secrets anymore. I accept him for who he is and vice
versa. We are in this together."

The couple has had to make some adjustments and learn about each other along
the way. Since moving to Seattle in June of last year, Benefield has been a
stay-at-home mom to 10-year-old Kenah, and 1 year-old Kenze. Before the
move, she worked as a mental health counselor, earning $33,000. "When I was
working as a counselor, I had a salary that took care of the bills, and
Terry's salary was extra," Benefield says. "I took care of all finances
except for his car. Then we moved, and I wasn't working or taking care of
the finances. Terry didn't tell me everything, and I didn't investigate, ask
questions, or press him until we fell into debt."

While adjusting to supporting the household on his income as a computer
support analyst for Sprint, some of the bills fell behind. "He so wanted me
to stay at home and not work that he got rid of the car and starting working
two extra jobs," Benefield says. "And I placed myself in charge of the
finances and got a part-time job." Realizing they had to take control, they
enrolled in the workshop.

"If you have a plan and know where you are going, you can enjoy the things
you would normally not have as a single person," Likens says. "Marriage is a
lifetime commitment and is far different than being single or just living
together."

About the course, he adds, "It opened up communication about the sensitive
issues of money and created a stronger bond between us. We have the
confidence that we are both on the same track and working on the same
financial goals."

MARRIAGE IS HARD WORK

While marriage can be a wealth building tool, the road to paradise is filled
with detours and obstacles. "What separates those who succeed from those who
fail is how they resolve their problems," says Rozario Slack, director of
Marriage, Fathering & Family Initiatives at First Things First, a nonprofit
community organization in Chattanooga, Tennessee. A marriage can be less
than harmonious when one partner is a spender, ignoring the budget, or
putting the family in debt.

Also, keep in mind that there are no absolutes. There are times when being
married can be a household tax liability. "Hire a CPA, and have him or her
prepare the taxes both jointly and separately," says Lyndall Medearis,
branch manager of the Houston office of AXA Advisors. "In some tax years,
joint filing will be the way to go, and some years, separate will be more
beneficial."

All told, marriage clearly promotes the economic, social, and psychological
well-being of African American men and women. A marriage between two
committed people who love each other and have access to support systems is a
win-win union.. Says Zagorsky: "Getting married and staying happily married
is a wonderful way to increase wealth."

Marriage: By the Numbers

* On virtually every indicator of economic well-being, married black adults
do better than their divorced, widowed, separated, and never-married peers.

* Married African Americans are also more likely to secure an important part
of the American dream--owning a home.

* Married African American men earn between 15% and 18% more than their
never-married peers.

* Married African American women earn about 13% more than their
never-married peers.

* From 1950 to 2000, the percentage of African American women who were
married declined from 62% to 36.1%. Among white women, the corresponding
decline was 66% to 57.4%.

* From 1980 to 2000, the percentage of young black adults who had never
married increased from 28.5% to 44.9%.

* In the first two years following divorce, family income for whites falls
30%, while family income for African Americans drops 53%.

SOURCES: THE CONSEQUENCES OF MARRIAGE FOR AFRICAN AMERICANS, INSTITUTE FOR
AMERICAN VALUES (2005), JOINT CENTER FOR POLITICAL AND ECONOMIC STUDIES, AND
DEMOGRAPHY (FEBRUARY 2005)

Copyright 2008 Earl G. Graves Publishing Company, Inc.

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- SEPARATION FROM MOM, DAD LINKED WITH LEARNING TROUBLE
University of Rochester Medical Center
May 16, 2008 

Separation from Mom, Dad Linked with Learning Trouble in Kids
18 percent of the urban children surveyed had been separated from their
parents at least once before kindergarten.

In the wake of divorce, illness, violence and other problems that can
unsettle homes, countless young children are liable to experience temporary
separations from one or both parents before packing their knapsack for
kindergarten. Published in the May/June issue of Ambulatory Pediatrics, a
new, community-wide study from Rochester, New York, warns that such kids are
at increased risk for learning difficulties and that these separations are
good predictors of which children may require special educational
interventions to succeed.

Previous research on parent-child separation has concentrated on children in
foster or kinship care, who are known to often experience considerable
emotional, behavioral and developmental problems. Yet little is known about
the impact of separation more generally, especially in less formalized
situations in which one or more parents temporarily leaves.

³In most cases, separation is a marker of instability. We suspect that homes
in which children are separated from their parents may be less nurturing
environments. Parents are less apt to be reading to their kids or taking
time to teach them new skills, such as tying shoes, practicing their letters
or penning their names,² said Sandy Jee, M.D., M.P.H., assistant professor
of Pediatrics at the University of Rochester Medical Center¹s Golisano
Children¹s Hospital, who led the study. ³Kindergarten can be a wet-cement
year for many kids, so it¹s important that we start their educational
trajectories on the best paths possible.²

The study enrolled 1,619 children between ages 4 and 6 who were entering
Rochester City School District kindergarten classrooms in the fall of 2003.
Parents or caregivers were asked if their child had ever been away from a
parent for more than a month, and if so, if the separation occurred once,
twice, or more than three times. These adults also completed the Parent¹s
Appraisal of Children¹s Experiences (PACE) survey to measure their
children¹s developmental skills by various observable behaviors (e.g., if
the child can cut with scissors; if he or she can tie their shoes). The
results were then analyzed to produce four 4-point scales, each measuring
different dimensions of healthy development, including: how well a child
learns new tasks; how well he or she uses language to express ideas; how
literate he or she is (e.g., can he or she read his own written name?); and
the quality of his or her speech (e.g., do other people often have
difficulty understanding the child?).

³We found that 18 percent of these urban children had been separated from
their parents at any point in their childhood,² Jee said. ³This was
surprising, but not unimaginable, since poverty is often linked with
volatility in homes. In fact, 7 percent of these kids had been separated two
or more times.²

Children who have been separated at any point scored significantly worse
both on the 4-point scales measuring their ability to learn new tasks and
their pre-literacy skills. Of note, their expressive language and speech
scores fared better ­ they were comparable to those of their non-separated
peers.

³This makes intuitive sense,² Jee said. ³In families disrupted by
separation, adults are less likely to make consistent efforts to expose kids
to new ideas, or to encourage reading. Without this first educational
coaching from mom or dad, kids¹ early learning and preliteracy skills are
less likely to really blossom.

³Thankfully, most school districts require a physical before a child enters
kindergarten,² she added. ³Pediatricians have a unique opportunity to
anticipate which children might be starting their educational careers at a
disadvantage, to recommend more screening for such children, and to help see
that they get the interventions they need.²

Jee and her colleagues do not know yet which types of separations might have
the most deleterious effects on kids¹ early learning, since the survey did
not ask specific reasons for the separation. It is possible that in some of
instances, separations might not be caused by upsets within the home, but
perhaps the pull of forces outside it: army duty, or perhaps a parent
leaving to tend to a sick relative.

³This study reminds us to treat any sort of separation as a marker for
possible psychosocial stress in a family,² Jee said. ³And intervening early
is the best way to minimize long-term educational ­ and vocational ­
deficits for these children.²

This research was supported in part by a grant from the Robert Wood Johnson
Physician Faculty Scholars Program.

For more media inquiries, contact:
Becky Jones
(585) 275-8490
rebecca_jones at urmc.rochester.edu

http://www.urmc.rochester.edu/pr/news/story.cfm?id=1987

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