Marriage 101 - 1/9/08

[Smartmarriages]

This article (below) on a group in Lithonia Georgia using the Arps 10 Great
Dates program is wonderful ­ in so many ways. The Arps, by the way, begin a
10 Great Dates TOUR in California tomorrow where they will train 10 Great
Date instructors at 10 different Calif Healthy Marriage Initiative sites!

But back to Georgia.  I love that this 10 Great Dates marriage program is
being presented by a local CHILD ABUSE PREVENTION organization - this makes
the powerful link between Smart Marriages AND Happy Families (and safe
children) very clear. I also love that the article so completely captures
what's wonderful about 10 Great Dates. Kudos to the reporter. When you read
it, you understand WHY 10 Great Dates won a Smart Marriages IMPACT award -
the total genius of teaching the marriage-strengthening skills through
DATES.  

> "It's designed to be fun. A lot of couples might not be interested in
> counseling, but they enjoy this no-pressure program.

> "We had a ball," he said. "One of the exercises is to look back to when we
> first started dating and what it was that attracted us to one another. And we
> also looked at how things had changed since we first got married."
> 
> Besides the "date" in which couples reflect on how their marriage began and
> progressed, other "dates" involve communicating the three most positive things
> about the marriage and the three things that could be improved upon, putting
> the sizzle back into the physical side of the relationship, appreciating
> differences, balancing busy lifestyles and dealing with conflict.

The Arps will exhibit and present their 10 Great Dates program at the San
Francisco Smart Marriages conference.  -diane


- MARRIAGE 101 
Rockdale Citizen (Georgia)
1/6/2008 
For article plus photos: http://tinyurl.com/yphq3r

Kenneth Huff, a program coordinator for Prevent Child Abuse Rockdale,
displays copies of the material that will be used for the upcoming 10 Great
Dates marriage enrichment program.

Marriage 101

Although statistics vary depending on the source, it is estimated that
between 40 and 50 percent of all marriages in America end in divorce.
According information derived from the 2000 U.S. Census, nearly 30 percent
of all adults living in Rockdale County are divorced.

Conyers residents Kenneth and June Huff have great hopes of making positive
changes in the country's divorce rate, starting right here at home.

The Huffs, who are both licensed, ordained ministers, will host a marriage
enrichment program called 10 Great Dates that focuses communication,
conflict, encouragement, love life and balancing the roles of parent and
partner. 

The program, which is free of charge and open for couples throughout the
east metro area, is set to begin at 6 p.m. on Tuesday, Jan. 22 at Conyers
First United Methodist Church in Olde Town. It will be held each Tuesday for
a 10-week period and the Huffs are endeavoring to line up volunteers to
provide a babysitting service for couples with young children.

Based on the book-and-video series "10 Great Dates to Energize Your
Marriage," created by Claudia and David Arp, founders of Marriage Alive
International, the 10 Great Dates program is sponsored locally by Prevent
Child Abuse Rockdale, the Nurturing Program and the Georgia Healthy Marriage
Initiative. 

Kenneth Huff, who works as program coordinator for the Nurturing Father
program of Prevent Child Abuse Rockdale and is co-pastor of Conyers-based
Spring of Life Ministries, said he attends monthly meetings of the Healthy
Marriage Initiative (which has a stated goal of reducing divorce in the
state by at least 10 percent) and has been certified through the state's
Department of Human Resources to teach the 10 Great Dates curricula.

"I'm bringing this class to Rockdale County to get people help with their
lives and with their marriages," said Huff. "The program is for any married
couple, from newlyweds to those struggling with empty nest syndrome."

Each program begins with a 30-minute-long video presentation by the Arps,
who have been married for more than 40 years and live in Virginia (David Arp
is a Georgia Tech graduate and Claudia Arp has a degree from the University
of Georgia). After the video, couples are sent out into the community to
have a "date" that encourages discussion about marriage issues.

"The date part of the program enables couples to examine their
relationship," said Huff. "It might be a trip down Memory Lane, a discussion
about how their marriage got off course or how the pressures of work and
home may have made them lose focus on each other.

"It's designed to be fun. A lot of couples might not be interested in
counseling, but they enjoy this no-pressure program. I'm trying to get local
restaurants to work with us on perhaps providing discounts to couples who
bring their assignments with them, and we're looking for volunteers and
sponsors for couples who might have babysitting challenges."

Huff said he and his wife, who have been married for 20 years and have four
children, recently completed the 10 Great Dates curriculum and found that it
does indeed help couples "refocus on their relationship."

"We had a ball," he said. "One of the exercises is to look back to when we
first started dating and what it was that attracted us to one another. And
we also looked at how things had changed since we first got married."

Besides the "date" in which couples reflect on how their marriage began and
progressed, other "dates" involve communicating the three most positive
things about the marriage and the three things that could be improved upon,
putting the sizzle back into the physical side of the relationship,
appreciating differences, balancing busy lifestyles and dealing with
conflict. 

Several couples from Spring of Life Ministries recently participated in a
pilot program run of 10 Great Dates with the Huffs and it went so well that
Kenneth Huff decided to offer the program to the community at large.

"There's no charge for the class," he said. "We'll keep it free until we run
out of books and materials, and then we'll just charge for that. And there's
really no limit to the number of participants, although for this first time
I'd like to see us have between 10 and 20 couples. We've already had a few
sign up." 

For more information on the 10 Great Dates marriage enrichment program, call
770-860-1775.

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Pre-Conference Training Institutes June 30-July 2
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