Announcements | Set Tivo | Santa Fe| Cancer | RFPs - texas and colorado| More Songs | Retreats| etc....2/9/08

[Smartmarriages]

- SET YOUR TIVO: POPENOE ON CBS SUNDAY MORNING
- MARRIAGE ENRICHMENT CONFERENCE: APRIL 19, 2008, SANTA FE
- MARRIAGE AND CANCER
- TEXAS: SPENDING THE 1% TANF MARRIAGE EDUCATION SET-ASIDE
- COLORADO REQUEST FOR APPLICATIONS: IMPROVING FATHERING AND PARENTING
- MARRIAGE SONGS: ROSES AND OTHER LITTLE THINGS MEAN A LOT
- LITTLE THINGS MEAN A LOT
- MARRIAGES GET BOOST FROM RETREAT
- PROTECTING CHILDREN FROM ABUSE

#################
- SET YOUR TIVO: POPENOE ON CBS SUNDAY MORNING
David Popenoe will appear tomorrow morning on CBS Sunday Morning tomorrow
at 9:00 AM eastern, on a segment discussing marriage and divorce.

###################

- MARRIAGE ENRICHMENT CONFERENCE: APRIL 19, 2008, SANTA FE

The Annual Marriage Enrichment Conference will be held on April 19, 2008 in
Santa Fe, New Mexico at the Immaculate Heart of Mary Retreat and Conference
Center.  The theme of this one-day conference is "Building Your Marriage on
the Rock."  Rev. Britto Berchmans (Archdiocese of Chicago) will share his
extensive knowledge and expertise on spirituality in marriage and the
reality facing couples in today's society.  There will be sessions on
"Emotionally Intelligent Relationships", "The Art of Wise Conflict
Resolution", and "Towards a Lifelong Marriage Spirituality."  This
conference is sponsored by The Marriage Enrichment Weekend Program, Inc.
For information and registration: http://www.tmewpi.org/ (click on NEWS or
SCHEDULES-April 2008), or contact Ralph and Ruth Johnson 505-884-8250.

Visit the Marriage Enrichment Weekend Program booth at Smart Marriages in
San Francisco for information about how to start a chapter in your area.

#####################
- MARRIAGE AND CANCER

> We are looking for people to share brief anecdotes and short stories that are
> a touching, uplifting, or funny glimpse into the lives of couples
> strengthening their marriages while responding to a diagnosis of cancer.
>  
> If you are willing to participate, please see the details on our website at:
> http://www.marriagetransformation.com/marriageandcancer.htm or email us for a
> copy at Susanne at marriagetransformation.com (phone: 216-383-9943).
>  
> We need stories by March 1, 2008 or as soon after that as possible,
> so that the book can be ready in time for the 2008 Smart Marriages Conference.
> Susanne Alexander
> Marriage Transformation Project
> susanne at marriagetransformation.com
> 216-383-9943
#####################
Texas was divided into regions with one agency selected for each region to
provide the marriage education services funded by the $7.5 MILLION PER YEAR
1% solution set-aside of Texas TANF funds to strengthen marriage. This is
the list of selected agencies each receiving $950 a year.  Here is the
language in the original RFP:

> HHSC seeks up to nine Vendors/Regional Intermediaries to provide
> capacity-building and service delivery management for premarital and healthy
> marriage education services with community- and/or faith-based organizations
> working in the area of healthy marriage development for HHSC Regions

And here are the recipients, the intermediaries:

> The Texas Health and Human Services Commission (HHSC) announce tentative
> contract awards for Twogether in Texas Healthy Marriage Program, RFP #
> 529-08-0075, to:
> * Region 1:    The Legacy Group- $950K
> * Region 2:    Texas Family Institute of Abilene- $950K
> * Region 3E: Alliance of North Texas Healthy Effective Marriages (ANTHEM)-
> $950K 
> * Region 4:     Longview Wellness Center- $950K
> * Region 5:     Family Services Southeast Texas- $950K
> * Region 7:     Lutheran Social Services of the South- $950K
> * Region 8:     Family Services Association of San Antonio- $950K
> * Region 9:     American Grant Management- $950K
> * Region 10:   Model City of El Paso- $950K
> 
> These awards are contingent upon the successful negotiation and execution of
> contracts.  In the event negotiations for any of these contracts are
> unsuccessful, HHSC may initiate negotiations with the next successful vendor
> or vendors. http://www.hhsc.state.tx.us/

Point of Contact for Information:

> Thomas Spears, Contract Administrator
> Texas Health and Human Services Commission
> Fax:  (512) 206-5006
> thomas.spears at hhsc.state.tx.us

What everyone wants to know is a bit harder to find out - WHICH MARRIAGE
EDUCATION PROGRAMS will be taught?  Many just assume the intermediaries will
be able to look over the available Marriage Education programs and select
the ones they think are best. But I  understand that the Marriage Education
programs that the above intermediaries will be allowed to use are in the
process of being selected by the state HHS.  I've heard rumors about how
this is happening ­ that two programs have been "preselected" (10 Great
Dates and Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts) with 10 more invited to a
showcase in early March where each will "perform" for 90 mins to the
intermediaries who will then vote on two. I've heard that PREP, Active
Relationships, Marriage Links, Lasting Love are among the invited 10 but I
haven't seen an official list.  Rumor has it that the two that get the most
votes will then join the other two preselected programs as "approved" for
delivery across the state.  I'm trying to confirm and will send update about
what's official when I get it. I have no info on how programs were
pre-selected, or how programs made it onto the list of 10 for the showcase,
or if there is any chance of still being added to the list. And, no, I did
not see a call for programs. If I had I would have forwarded it to the
listserv.  Sorry.    - diane

#############################
- COLORADO REQUEST FOR APPLICATIONS: IMPROVING FATHERING AND PARENTING

> The Colorado Department of Human Services is pleased to announce the Request
> for Applications (RFA) for year three funding (October 2008 ­ September 2009)
> of the Colorado Promoting Responsible Fatherhood Community Access Grant.

> In October 2006, Colorado Department of Human Services was awarded a federal
> grant of $10 million to be used in the next five years with the focus and
> intent of improving paternal relationships and parenting. Of the $2 million
> received annually, nearly $1.2 million is awarded to appropriate organizations
> statewide that meet the application requirements.
 
> Funding priority is given to faith and community based organizations who
> provide fatherhood parent skills training and healthy marriage / couples
> relationships training as core services. Of the total community access funds
> available for service providers, 70% is allocated for grass roots and faith
> based organizations that have social services as a part of their mission, are
> headquartered in the local community, have a total operating budget of
> $300,000 or less or have six or fewer full-time equivalent employees.

> The state will award grants of up to $50,000 each. Funded organizations are
> required to establish collaborations with local organizations including a
> domestic violence provider, the local workforce program, a local mental health
> provider and the local county department of social or human services to set
> protocol and meet the individual needs of participants.

> Funding awards and contracts are competitive each year. A contract for one
> funding cycle does not guarantee future funding or similar award amounts.
> Application Documents are available online at
> http://www.coloradodads.com/index.cfm?page=13
> 
##########################
- MARRIAGE SONGS: ROSES AND OTHER LITTLE THINGS MEAN A LOT


> Diane: 
> I hope you can set up a button on the website for these
> song recommendations, like the marriage quotes.
> 
> I'm already planning to make use of them in my next class....
> Especially like the Buy Me A  Rose message, as it will
> 'stick' in people's heads better than my words. This song
> would make a great PSA if we had the $$.
> Jana Staton

THERE is a button on the Quotes page....I'm trying to post all of them, but
remind me if I don't.  Go to Quotes page and click on *Lyrics and Other Good
Mush*.  - diane 
-------------------------
- LITTLE THINGS MEAN A LOT
> Diane, I've always loved the lyrics to Kitty Kallen's "Little Things Mean A
Lot". - Lori Gordon
>  
> The lyrics:
>  
> Send me a kiss from across the room
>     Say I look nice when I'm not
> Touch my hair as you pass my chair
>     Little things mean a lot.
>  
> Give me your arm as we cross the street
>     Call me at six on the dot
> A line a day when you're far away
>     Little things mean a lot.
>  
> Don't have to buy me diamonds or pearls
>     Champagne, sables, and such
> I never cared much for diamonds and pearls
>     'cause honestly, honey, they just cost money.
>  
> Give me a hand when I've lost the way
>     Give me your shoulder to cry on
> Whether the day is bright or gray
>     Give me your heart to rely on.
>  
> Send me the warmth of a secret smile
>     To show me you haven't forgot
> For now and forever, that's always and ever
>     Little things mean a lot.

I agree, plus it's one you'd think husbands would love....."diamonds and
pearls, 'cause honestly, honey, they just cost money....."   ;)  - diane

Listen to it on YouTube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=USt9W5lqg_E

#######################
- MARRIAGES GET BOOST FROM RETREAT

Marriages get boost from retreat
By ERIN CRAWFORD
Des Moines Register
Feb 9, 2008 

Deb Hovey of Titonka thinks God saved her marriage with the help of a
ponytailed biker.

The turnaround took place at Riverside Lutheran Bible Camp in Story City.

The Hoveys said the weekend saved their marriage. They've gone back every
year since.

Full article: 
http://tinyurl.com/2ftnpd

########################
- PROTECTING CHILDREN FROM ABUSE

Partners For Life
Jackson Free Press (Mississippi)
by Kelly Bryan Smith
February 6, 2008

> ³Healthy marriages are the best way to protect children from abuse,² Bennett
> said.

It was lunch time on a Wednesday, and two groups of young adults raced to
assemble Spiderman and Diego puzzles without the help of the pictures on the
box lids. The point of this frustrating exercise was to demonstrate the
second habit of a successful marriage or relationship: Begin with the end in
mind. How can a couple move forward productively in their relationship
without having a shared sense of what they are working toward?

The Metropolitan YMCAs of Mississippi have partnered with New Horizon
Church, the North Midtown Community Development Corp., the Center for
Domestic Violence and Consumer Credit Counseling Services to offer a program
called ³Partners For Life: A Healthy Marriage Initiative.² The
relationship-building program is funded through a grant by the Mississippi
Department of Human Services.

Joe Bennett, the executive director of the YMCA¹s Family Support Services,
said that this program teaches ³skills to form and maintain better
relationships.² The full training program lasts eight weeks. Not all
participants are married, but the principles, taken from ³The 8 Habits of a
Successful Marriage² by Jane and John Covey, can be applied in order to
strengthen any kind of relationship.

Bennett¹s motivation in offering this program is decreasing domestic
violence and child abuse by encouraging the formation and maintenance of
stable, two-parent families. This message is especially important to
Mississippi, where 47 percent of children live in single-parent homes.
Bennett emphasized that children growing up in stable, two-parent families
are much more likely to be physically and mentally healthy, to excel in
school and to avoid poverty.

³Healthy marriages are the best way to protect children from abuse,² Bennett
said.

During the meeting, participants brainstormed, defining their values and
priorities before creating mission statements for their lives and their
relationships. They used words like love, education, children and trust. ³If
you ain¹t got trust, you ain¹t got nothing,² one young woman piped up.

Bennett described one couple on the brink of divorce who entered the
Partners For Life program after a court ordered them to attend counseling.
The couple arrived to the first session in separate cars. They sat at
opposite ends of the room and even got into a fight at one point during the
session.

³They had to be physically separated,² Bennett said.

But by the third session, the couple arrived in the same car and even held
hands. The program helped them to have a productive conversation about their
relationship and reinvest in their marriage.

³This is obviously an extreme case,² Bennett said, ³but the program really
works.²

Participants can get referrals for follow-up mentoring, and support
regarding domestic violence, mental health, financial health and other
matters. Currently, the program is designed for low-income participants, but
Bennett hopes to develop a similar, more inclusive program to offer through
local churches and corporations.

The average age of participants is in the range of 19 to 20 years old. Many
are not married, but Bennett emphasized the importance of teaching ³what a
good relationship looks like early on,² before young adults get entangled by
negative romantic attachments.

Send submissions and comments for the listserv to: diane at smartmarriages.com
Do NOT hit "reply". If you hit reply your email will go into cyberspace and
NO ONE will see your email.

This is a moderated list. Submissions and comments are read by Diane Sollee,
editor. Please indicate if your comment is NOT to be shared with the list.
PLEASE include your email address and/or url as part of your signature.

Please also understand that with thousands of subscribers, not all comments
can be shared. Also realize that opinions expressed are not necessarily
shared by members of the Coalition.

To SUBSCRIBE, UNSUBSCRIBE, or Change your subscription address,
use the form at: http://www.smartmarriages.com. Click Newsletter/Listserv -
in the left column under the puzzle piece.

To read past posts to the listserv, visit the Archive at:
http://lists101.his.com/pipermail/smartmarriages/

12th Annual Smart Marriages® Conference, Hilton San Francisco Hotel,
July 2 - 5, 2008  
Pre-Conference Training Institutes June 30-July 2
Post-Conference Training Institutes July 6

List your program and resources on the Directory of Classes at
http://www.smartmarriages.com/directory_browse.html

Order conference audio & video CD/DVD/MP3s: 800-241-7785 or
http://www.iPlaybackSmartMarriages.com

Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education, LLC (CMFCE)
Diane Sollee, Director
5310 Belt Rd NW, Washington, DC 20015-1961
http://www.smartmarriages.com
202-362-3332

FAIR USE NOTICE: This e-newsletter/site contains copyrighted material the
use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright
owner. We make such material available in our efforts to advance
understanding of marriage, family, couples, divorce, legislation, family
breakdown, etc. We understand this constitutes a 'fair use' of such material
as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with
Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed
without profit to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the
included information for research and educational purposes. For more
information go to: http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/17/107.shtml. If you
wish to use copyrighted material from this site for purposes of your own
that go beyond 'fair use', you must obtain permission from the copyright
owner.