Trends: Relationship Economic Summit / Reasons for Optimism / Coaching - 12/08/08

Mon Dec 8 13:17:10 EST 2008

- A RELATIONSHIP FINANCE SUMMIT!! THINKING SYSTEMS!
- CAN YOUR PERSONALITY HELP YOU WEATHER TOUGH ECONOMIC TIMES?
- MARRIAGE COACHING: A SIGN OF THE TIMES

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- A RELATIONSHIP FINANCE SUMMIT!! THINKING SYSTEMS!

Who knew?  I hope some of you will join me at this fascinating event Jan 14
in DC.  
- diane  

> Relationship Finance Summit being hosted by the Office of Financial Education
> on January 14, 2009 at the Department of the Treasury. To find out more
> information on this summit and to register (must register by 12/18), please go
> to: http://tinyurl.com/5s6otr
The pdf is currently the first item on at this web page.

The pdf is a most enlightened letter of invitation that says in the effort
to increase financial literacy the department is recognizing that there is a
problem with financial education programs that are directed at educating
INDIVIDUALS because "most American adults live in households of more than
one." .....and that individuals are often not able to translate what they
learn in the seminars to others at home.  And, furthermore, that the
consequences of this failure are "not only financial. . . Money disputes are
one of the leading causes of divorce in the United States." To advance the
developing field of "relationship finance" Dan Iannicola, Deputy Asst Sec
for Financial Ed, invites us to attend a special relationship finance
conference at Dept of Treasury from 10am - 4pm. We are also invited to RSVP
for the Financial Literacy and Education meeting the next day - 20 agencies
will be represented.

I've RSVPd and hope to see some of you there on the 14th.  We can have
lunch. - diane 

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- CAN YOUR PERSONALITY HELP YOU WEATHER TOUGH ECONOMIC TIMES?

USA TODAY
By Sharon Jayson
December 4, 2008

I love this clip:
> But some personality types appear to thrive amid flux, says psychologist Frank
> Farley of Temple University in Philadelphia. He suggests that "Type T"
> personalities are thrill seekers who tend to be self-confident, are often
> creative and innovative, have high energy and believe they control their own
> fate. He says they may view the economic uncertainty as "an opportunity."

Certainly we're a coalition of optimists and, though we're as concerned as
the next person, we, as marriage educators, see GREAT OPPORTUNITY in the
economic downturn.  Our easy-to-teach, highly cost-effective marriage
education programs have never been more needed  when the going gets rough,
couples need their marriages more than ever  and we know can help.   Go to
your community and your congregations let them know that you've got
solutions. It takes a lot of strong solid marriages to keep the village
strong. Yes we CAN! - diane

Does the economic downturn terrify you? Or are you plotting a new strategy
for life with less money?

Your reaction offers a peek into your psyche, say researchers who study how
personality shapes people's reactions to uncertain times.

"People think about themselves and others in terms of typology ‹ you're this
type," says researcher Peter Jason Rentfrow of the University of Cambridge
in England.

Many academics who study personality rely on the "Five Factor Model" ("Big
Five") a system that describes personality in five dimensions, such as
neuroticism vs. emotional stability, or conscientiousness vs. not being very
thorough.

Disaster ‹ or opportunity?

For those with higher levels of neuroticism (seen as being tense or
anxious), these uncertain times make for lots of angst, says Jacob Hirsh, a
University of Toronto grad student who co-authored research in the October
issue of Psychological Science. Uncertainty made some people even more
anxious than negative feedback did, he says.

But some personality types appear to thrive amid flux, says psychologist
Frank Farley of Temple University in Philadelphia. He suggests that "Type T"
personalities are thrill seekers who tend to be self-confident, are often
creative and innovative, have high energy and believe they control their own
fate. He says they may view the economic uncertainty as "an opportunity."

Optimism and resiliency are also positive traits for a down economy.
Psychologists say most traits are about half due to genetics and half to
environment, but Suzanne Segerstrom, a psychologist at the University of
Kentucky-Lexington, says optimism seems more externally influenced and
changes over time.

Whether you feel you control your own destiny also plays a part, says
economist Arthur Goldsmith of Washington and Lee University in Lexington,
Va. Those with an internal locus of control feel they have a strong
influence over events in their lives. Those with an external locus believe
most things are beyond their control, he says.

Those focused on money and possessions also may struggle, says Richard Ryan,
a psychologist at the University of Rochester who studies materialism and
shopping.

But those who focus on the here-and-now fare better, his research shows.
"People who are able to focus on the present are more able to enjoy things
going on in the moment that really do make us happy ‹ like relationships,
being in nature, giving to others," he says.

"Nervously optimistic" is how Allan Margolin, a father of three who works at
a non-profit organization, says he and his college professor wife see the
unsteady economy.

"It's just coming at you very fast," he says. "There's opportunity to feel
optimistic and pessimistic, usually a few times a day."

They live in New York City, which Rentfrow's research has found high on
neuroticism but also on openness. His six-year study of more than 600,000
Americans, in September's Perspectives on Psychological Science, suggests
some traits vary by where you live.

Unemployment takes its toll

Rentfrow says certain traits can help buffer economic effects. "An
emotionally stable and open person who may be in the unfortunate position of
being jobless might be better equipped to find some sort of alternative form
of income because they're more adaptable," he says.

But even among optimists, joblessness takes a toll, finds a new analysis of
2006 data from German households published in the journal Social Indicators
Research.

"When people get unemployed, life satisfaction decreases and stays low until
they get re-employed," says co-author Ulrich Schimmack of the University of
Toronto. "You don't get used to unemployment."

Goldsmith says that even when things start improving, a person's self-esteem
following joblessness recovers more slowly. "Our work shows that there is a
lingering 'hangover' effect," he says.

The current crisis is being called the worst since the Great Depression. But
historian Jeffrey Hyson of Saint Joseph's University in Philadelphia says,
"There's a lack of immediacy in our cultural relationship with the Great
Depression that makes it very difficult for us to emotionally understand
what a real depression was like or would be like. It's seen as a very
distant period that doesn't look like today. We can't imagine those same
privations occurring in today's world."

Psychologist Brent Roberts of the University of Illinois-Urbana-Champaign
says knowing about personality may be somewhat useful, but self- doesn't
change the economic reality.

"It may help you understand why you might react more negatively or
positively than friends, but we're all going to have to figure out some way
to deal with it, despite our personalities," he says.

Here's the link for the article, sidebars:
http://tinyurl.com/68bexg

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- MARRIAGE COACHING: A SIGN OF THE TIMES

Just want to point out that I'm seeing signs every day that Marriage
Coaching is a hot new trend. Coaching has been around for decades (forever?)
but It makes sense that it's seeing a resurgence and a stronger application
to couples work, in light of the economic crunch. It's cost effective and
often includes budget and career-transition coaching - helps couples "have
the talk".  

In Orlando you can take a two-day preconference training institute on
Marriage Coaching presented by one of the most renowned experts in the
coaching field: Pat Williams.

> Life Coaching With Couples: The NEW Profession
> Pat Williams, EdD, Mike Lillibridge, PhD
> Learn the basics of Life Coaching, the Peoplemap Assessment, and the skills to
> coach couples to overcome the gap between where they are and where they want
> to be in their relationship. Includes skills practice, demonstration and
> practice-building tips. $100 spouse discount. Click for more information:
> http:www.smartmarriages.com/williams.html

Also, in Orlando, The Mars/Venus Coach folks will present a 90-min workshop
and will answer your questions at their exhibit about how you can qualify
and sign on with them.  Coaching is a rapidly growing field - a great
transition career. 

> Mars Venus Coaching
> Rich Bernstein, Melodie Tucker
> Understand the differences between coaching, consulting, and therapy, the
> benefits of coaching, a variety of coaching processes, and details for joining
> the worldwide Mars Venus Coaching team.

And, the Phone Coaching section of the Smart Marriages Directory of Programs
is growing.  Here's a new listing that came in today with more in the
pipeline.  Note that you can very effectively help even the most serious
deeply troubled couples and individuals via phone coaching - see Divorce
Busting and Beyond Affairs, etc.  - diane

> Coaching for Couples & Individuals
> An alternative to counseling and therapy, Marriage Coaching offers a positive
> approach that focuses on your goals for the future, not the pain of the past.
> Couples and/or individuals learn to change old, damaging habits into new
> positive behaviors that create connection even in the most painful times.
> Marriage Coaching is most effective because is offers the combination of
> proven marriage education techniques and the accountability of coaching.
> Specialties include handling infidelity, marriage enhancement, obstinate
> spouses and individuals whose spouses refuse to participate.
> Mimi Daniel, MS, PCC
> Website: http://www.xyoutlook.com

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13th Annual Smart Marriages® Conference, Shingle Creek Resort,
Orlando, Florida, July 6-12, 2009 (General Conference July 8-11)
Pre-Conference Training Institutes July 6-8
Post-Conference Training Institutes July 12

Shingle Creek Resort: http://www.rosenshinglecreek.com/

Conference schedule, registration, & exhibit information:
http://www.smartmarriages.com/conferencedetails.html

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http://www.smartmarriages.com/directory_browse.html

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http://www.smartmarriages.com
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