Culture and Marriage -- America Caste | On-Line Dangers | Russia TV - 9/19/07

[Smartmarriages]

- MARRIAGE AND CASTE IN AMERICA
- BOSNIAN COUPLE DIVORCE AFTER ON-LINE 'AFFAIR'
- RUSSIANS TUNE INTO US-STYLE LOVE AND MARRIAGE

- MARRIAGE AND CASTE IN AMERICA

> Hi Folks,
> I just finished Marriage and Caste in America by Kay Hymowitz.  It is as
> wonderful as Diane said it was in her introduction in Denver (You might
> remember Diane said we should not just read this book, but memorize it.  That
> we'd need to know these arguments by heart when we talk to policy people,
> reporters, skeptics, etc.) Diane was right.  Kay's keynote presentation really
> was only a small glimpse of the wealth of material in this book.  You have to
> read it from beginning to end -- especially the end.  Such hope.
> Carolyn

This is an email Carolyn Curtis, Executive Director of the California
Healthy Marriage Coalition, sent to the California list serv.  Carolyn's
right that everyone should read the book. It's only the second book in our
11 year history to receive the Smart Marriages Impact Award (order it for
only $11.86 here: http://www.smartmarriages.com/app/Media.Booklist)

Carolyn is also right that Kay's keynote in Denver only covered part of
what's covered in the book, but I'd say it's crucially important to listen
to it anyway.  It's a great one - provides a great overview and inspires.
And, according to my mother this session that features keynotes by Kay
Hymowitz, Nisa Muhammad, and Kay Reed was "the most interesting one of the
conference."  If you missed the conference and can only watch one session or
only bring one for a staff teach-in, watch this one - or listen. And as I
said about reading the book, listen three times....till you've got the
marching directions memorized.

Order session #757-004 on DVD, CD or as an MP3 download from 800-241-7785 or
at http://www.iplaybacksmartmarriages.com

It's the inspiration we all need, session #757-004

> Kay Hymowitz
> These days marriage is not just a personal issue; it's separating America's
> haves and the have-nots. And it threatens to do so far into the future. A
> lot of people think this is because the less fortunate don't have the money
> to get married. Not true. Marriage is probably the most important way to
> ensure economic security and even success - for you and your children.
> 
> Black Marriage Day
> Nisa Muhammad
> Black Marriage Day spearheaded and anchors the growing national movement
> that invites the Black Community to reconsider marriage. It brings a wealth
> of marriage strengthening resources to the people ­ to those most in need
> and, yet, who have had the least access. More and more community and faith
> organizations, grass roots activists, and lay educators are joining the
> ranks, determined to make a difference. Learn how you and your community can
> get on board.
> 
> We Have to Start With the Kids
> Kay Reed
> Helping youth develop the skills and attitudes necessary for healthy, happy
> marriages is critical if we are truly going to change the culture. Plus, in
> addition to increased confidence that they know why and how to get and stay
> married, the marriage ed programs give side benefits including reduced verbal
> and physical aggression, improved communication with teachers, peers, parents
> and future employers. Bringing programs to your community is no longer an
> option, it's, as the kids would say, a "no brainer". Learn how easy it is!


####################
- BOSNIAN COUPLE DIVORCE AFTER ON-LINE 'AFFAIR'

Ananova.com (UK)
Sept 17, 2007 

[This one is stranger than fiction, but you can see why I couldn't resist.
File this one under "microtrends". -diane ]

A Bosnian couple are getting divorced after finding out they had been
secretly chatting each other up online under fake names.

Sana Klaric, 27, and husband Adnan, 32, from Zenica, poured out their hearts
to each other over their marriage troubles, and both felt they had found
their real soul mate.

The couple met on an online chat forum while he was at work and she in an
internet cafe, and started chatting under the names Sweetie and Prince of
Joy.

They eventually decided to meet up - but there was no happy ending when they
realised what had happened.

Now they are both filing for divorce - with each accusing the other of being
unfaithful.

Sana said: "I thought I had found the love of my life. The way this Prince
of Joy spoke to me, the things he wrote, the tenderness in every expression
was something I had never had in my marriage.

"It was amazing, we seemed to be stuck in the same kind of miserable
marriages - and how right that turned out to be.

"We arranged to meet outside a shop and both of us would be carrying a
single rose so we would know the other.

"When I saw my husband there with the rose and it dawned on me what had
happened I was shattered. I felt so betrayed. I was so angry."

Adnan said: "I was so happy to have found a woman who finally understood me.
Then it turned out that I hadn't found anyone new at all.

"To be honest I still find it hard to believe that the person, Sweetie, who
wrote such wonderful things to me on the internet, is actually the same
woman I married and who has not said a nice word to me for years."

###########################
- RUSSIANS TUNE INTO US-STYLE LOVE AND MARRIAGE

Russians tune into US-style love and marriage
The New York Times 
Clifford Levy, Moscow
September 15, 2007

TURN on the sitcom that is the hottest television show in Russia, and it all
seems so familiar. Moored to his living room couch is a shoe salesman who is
more interested in watching sports than conjugal relations.

His wife has shocking hair and an even more shocking mouth. A couple of
ne'er-do-well teenagers round out this bawdy, bickering bunch.

In fact, the show is an authorised copy of the American sitcom Married Š
With Children, with a Russian cast and dialogue but scripts that hew closely
to those of the original.

This knock-off is such a sensation, especially among the young viewers
coveted by advertisers, that its actors have become household names, and
billboards advertising its new season are plastered around Moscow.

A drum beat of anti-Americanism may be coming from the Kremlin these days,
but across Russia people for the first time are embracing that
quintessentially American genre, the television sitcom, not to mention one
of its brassiest examples.

The show's success says something not only about changing tastes here but
also about Russia's improved standing as a whole. Sitcoms are typically
grounded in middle-class life and poke fun at it.

The popularity of the Russian version of Married Š With Children and other
adaptations of American sitcoms suggests that Russia has attained enough
stability and wealth in recent years that these kinds of jokes resonate with
viewers.

In addition to Married Š With Children, adaptations of two other shows,
Who's the Boss? and The Nanny, have also become hugely popular here.

Married Š With Children, which ran from 1987 to 1997 in the US, has been
renamed Schastlivy Vmeste ("Happy Together"). Its setting has been moved
from the Chicago area to its Russian equivalent, the everyman metropolis of
Yekaterinburg, in the heartland. The sniping couple, Al and Peg Bundy, have
become Gena and Dasha Bukin.

Still, the thrust is the same: sending up family life as outrageously ‹ or
as vulgarly, depending on your point of view ‹ as possible.

Russian television has come a long way from the staid, politically tinged
fare of communist times, and these days there are many channels featuring a
steady diet of movies, police dramas, game shows, soap operas and reality
shows ‹ some locally produced, some imported and dubbed.

Television news programs, which are tightly overseen by President Vladimir
Putin's administration, are another story.

As in Soviet days, they rarely divert from the Kremlin's point of view.
Barbed political satire, which thrived for a time on television after the
fall of the Soviet Union, has also been suppressed under Mr Putin.


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