Marriage Friendly Progress Report | Breaking the vow renewal Record UPDATE - 9/18/07

Tue Sep 18 17:26:42 EDT 2007

- MARRIAGE FRIENDLY THERAPIST REGISTRY PROGRESS REPORT!
- DAILY TEMPERATURE READING
- BREAKING THE WORLD RECORD ON VOW RENEWAL
- NEW RECORD!  HOW DO WE MAKE THIS OFFICIAL?

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- MARRIAGE FRIENDLY THERAPIST REGISTRY PROGRESS REPORT!

I find it amazing that less than two years after launching at the Smart
Marriages Dallas Conference, the National Registry of Marriage Friendly
Therapists (www.marriagefriendlytherapists.com) is getting some very
impressive endorsements.  I just noticed that it is listed as one of two
referral sources by the HARVARD MENTAL HEALTH LETTER (!!), and by the
National Extension Relationship and Marriage Education Network, and it is
singled out as a referral source on the U.S Catholic Bishops' website "For
Your Marriage." I called to ask Bill Doherty about it but he's at a big
conference presenting on the registry (figures). So, I talked to his
daughter Elizabeth who says she's been spending all her time *optimizing*
the site so it shows up really high if you Google marriage therapy and
counseling. As an example, she said in California if you type in "premarital
counseling" the site ranks #5. Now I'm even more impressed. And I guess the
referrals are no big mystery.  There was 1) a huge need and 2) they're doing
what it takes to get the resource "out there".

Elizabeth says their main goal is to fill any gaps in the registry in so
that couples in any part of the country that want to save their marriages
can find someone that can truly help them. YOU CAN HELP by letting
marriage-friendly therapists in your area know about this referral source.
Therapists pay a $200 annual listing fee to be on the Registry, with most of
the fee going to advertising to couples.  You can also send couples directly
to the site so they can find a well-trained, marriage-friendly therapist.
The more therapists listed and the more couples using the site, the better
chance we have of turning the tide on divorce.  You might also send them to
the transcript of Bill Doherty's 1999 Smart Marriages keynote "How Therapy
Can Be Hazardous to Your Marital Health". Obviously this registry was the
next obvious step - and a perfect example of the adage: if you want
something done, you have to do it yourself.

You can send Elizabeth at marriagefriendlytherapists.com the names and contact
information of therapists you would recommend. She'll contact them and help
them figure out the ropes and get them listed.  And, she says she'll even
*optimize* their listing page for them.  I think we all need to figure out
what this *optimizing* is all about.  Maybe we could get Elizabeth to
present a workshop on this in San Francisco.  Whatcha think?

Also, because I know you'll ask: Yes, Bill Doherty will repeat his Marriage
Friendly Therapist one-day Institute Training on Sunday July 6 from 8:30am -
5:30pm. 

> Marriage-Friendly Marital Therapy
> Bill Doherty, PhD - will be scheduled post-conference in SF, Sun July 6
> Learn the essential skills and values that distinguish a marriage friendly
> therapist helping couples on the brink of divorce. Video demonstrates a
> practical protocol for your practice.

- diane 

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- DAILY TEMPERATURE READING

> Hi Dianne:  I love your organization and website and appreciate  all of
> regular emails that you send out.  Now I am curious...what is the Daily
> Temperature Reading that you suggest we could use in our Vow Renewals???  JMB 

I should have given the url.  I suggested the Daily Temperature Reading
(DTR) as a very brief, very helpful exercise that would be easy to introduce
as part of a vow renewal ceremony.  You could even have different couples
demonstrate each step.  The DTR is used in many marriage education programs.
You can find a version at:
http://www.smartmarriages.com/tempreading.html

- diane 

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- BREAKING THE WORLD RECORD ON VOW RENEWAL

> Hi Diane,
> 
> Seems like if all the couples at the Smart Marriages conference renewed their
> vows, it would easily break the record. Why not put it on the program in SF?
> Jim Stephens

That's a thought, though I don't think we have that many couples.
Out of the 2,500 in Denver, we only had 263 that registered at the spouse
rate.  However, it seems EVERY person I talk to is bringing their spouse to
SF - or, put another way, it sounds as though everyone's spouse says they're
coming to San Francisco.  So, we could try. BUT I hope some CHMI will break
the Aussie record of 278 in Feb for Marriage Week (or, whenever you have a
big event) and we can then try to break it again in San Francisco.

Here is Marriage Week info - ideas to get you started:
http://www.smartmarriages.com/marriage.week.html

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- NEW RECORD! HOW DO WE MAKE THIS OFFICIAL?

> Diane, I guess we have been breaking records without even knowing it. We had
> 612 couples each married 50 YEARS or more renew their vows at our annual
> Archdiocesan Golden Wedding Anniversary Mass at Holy Name Cathedral in
> Chicago. Cardinal Francis George was the celebrant of the Mass. This took
> place on Sunday, September 9. That was over 60,000 years of marriage
> experience in the Cathedral.
>  
> Each year we put together a booklet of advice from the couples about their
> tips for staying married, the best part about being married, the worst, how
> they got through difficult times, how they met, etc. 320 couples contributed
> tips this year. The booklet is called "True Soul Mates: Couples Married 50
> Years Share Their Advice for Successful Marriage."  If anyone else wants a
> copy, send $15 to cover the copying and mailing costs.
>  
> Kim Hagerty
> Catholic Couples Editor
> Catholic Families Today Radio Show Producer
> Family Ministries
> 155 East Superior Street
> Chicago IL 60611-2911
> 312.751.8350
> khagerty at archchicago.org
> <http://www.familyministries.org>
> 312.751.8350

OK, who can contact Guinnes World Records to see how we go about getting
this made official! Now 612 - that's a number to push against!  Let's see
what we're really made of.  - diane

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