Divorce down? | Stepmom Guide | PREP in Bradenton - 5/9/07

[Smartmarriages]

- PER CAPITA DIVORCE RATE DOWN
- DIVORCE BILLBOARD DOWN
- STEPMOM GUIDE 
- BRADENTON FLORIDA TEACHES THE PREP PROGRAM

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- PER CAPITA DIVORCE RATE DOWN
(That's per 1,000 people, NOT per 1,000 married women - the usual measure.)

Divorce Rates Hit Lowest Level Since 1970
Per Capita Rate May Reflect Fewer Marriages
May 8, 2007 
Associated Press

. . . America's divorce rate began climbing in the late 1960s and
skyrocketed during the '70s and early '80s, as virtually every state adopted
no-fault divorce laws. The rate peaked at 5.3 divorces per 1,000 people in
1981.

But since then it's dropped by one-third, to 3.6. That's the lowest rate
since 1970.

What's fueling that decline? According to 20 scholars, marriage-promotion
experts and divorce lawyers consulted by The Associated Press, a lot of
things. .  . 

The Bush administration believes such programs have merit -- its Healthy
Marriage initiative has disbursed more than $200 million nationwide in the
past five years. Bill Coffin, the Department of Health and Human Services'
special assistant for marriage education, is convinced the programs are a
factor in the declining divorce rate.

"The word is getting out that marriage doesn't have to be a crap shoot --
it's not the luck of the draw," Coffin said. "It's how you deal with the
inevitable conflict and anger in marriage."

He subscribes to the theory that better-educated, wealthier couples have
better odds of success in marriage.

"What we're doing is making sure the poor have access to some help and
support," Coffin said. "So many people never heard of marriage education
before."

One of the researchers whose studies detected the "divorce divide" is
University of Maryland sociologist Steve Martin. Comparing marriages from
early 1970s to those of the early '90s, Martin found that the rate of
breakups within 10 years of marriage dropped by one-third among
college-educated women while remaining stable among less-educated women.

"Overall, marriages will become more stable only if the lower two-thirds of
the population starts behaving like the top third," Martin said. "There's a
lot of debate -- is that possible? Can marriage training or other programs
give all couples the sort of relationship skills that people imagine college
graduates have?"

For the full article: http://www.local6.com/family/13279252/detail.html

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- DIVORCE BILLBOARD DOWN

City rips down racy divorce billboard
Chicago Sun-Times 
May 9, 2007
BY ABDON M. PALLASCH Legal Affairs Reporter

As quickly as it appeared, it was gone.

The salacious "Life is short. Get a divorce" billboard with barely clothed
models was ripped from its Rush Street perch one week after it went up and
one day after the Sun-Times reported it.

The story was picked up internationally, running on CNN, MSNBC, ABC's "Good
Morning America" -- even on "The View."

That's not the kind of publicity Chicago officials wanted as they seek to
host the 2016 Olympics, say supporters of attorney Corri Fetman.

"They ripped our billboard down without due process," Fetman said. "We own
that art. I feel violated."

But it wasn't a moral crusade that brought down the billboard -- it was the
lack of a proper permit, claimed Ald. Burton Natarus (42nd), who leaves the
City Council this month after 36 years.

Always a stickler for rules, Natarus got a call about the sign and
determined the sign company did not have a proper permit.

"I called the building inspector and told him to do his job and he did,"
Natarus said. "It has nothing to do with content or anything else. They did
not have a permit and they were ordered to take it down."

Some neighbors resented the billboard, saying it would push Rush Street
revelers in shaky marriages to divorce. Fetman said it would not persuade
happy couples to divorce.

Some lawyers said the ad sullied their already beleaguered reputations.

"I looked out my window at 3 o'clock and it was gone," said neighbor Lisa
Price, a critic of the billboard. "The neighborhood has been cleaned up. My
peaceful view is restored and I'm very happy about it.

But Fetman and her law partner, Kelly Garland, say even people who disliked
the billboard should worry about the threat to free speech.

"This isn't just about us --it's about everybody's First Amendment rights to
say what they believe in," Garland said.

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- STEPMOM GUIDE 

Dear Diane: 
 
My  book, A Career Girl's Guide to Becoming a Stepmom: Expert Advice From
Other Stepmoms On How To Juggle Your Job, Your Marriage and Your New
Stepkids (HarperCollins) is out this week! I'll be signing books at Smart
Marriages at the National Stepfamily Resource Center (NSRC) booth. Francesca
Adler-Baeder, executive director of NSRC wrote the foreward:
 
"In my professional life as a family scientist and stepfamily researcher,
and in my personal life as a stepfamily member, I have had the opportunity
to review many and varied forms of resources. Jacquelyn Fletcher¹s book is
utterly unique ­ and necessary ... The approach she takes is absolutely
unprecedented. She combines real women¹s experiences, research information,
and a businesswoman¹s framework in order to provide a strategy-focused
approach to building a loving, nurturing marriage and stepfamily. Jacque
brings research-validated information to life through her own stories and
the stories of the wonderful women you will read about. In doing so, she
also fills in the gaps on yet to be discovered research information. What
she taps so well are the identity issues that single, child-free, career
women turned stepmoms wrestle with. We have not yet begun to tap this
through formal research. Her and her group of experts¹ insights are
powerful, touching, and enlightening."
- Francesca Adler-Baeder, PhD, Executive Director, The National Stepfamily
Resource Center Director, Center for Children, Youth, and Family Department
of Human Development and Family Studies, Auburn University, Alabama
  
Jacquelyn Fletcher 
A Career Girl's Guide to Becoming a Stepmom
HarperCollins, May 2007
http://www.becomingastepmom.com

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- BRADENTON FLORIDA TEACHES THE PREP PROGRAM

At the Denver Smart Marriages Conference you can train as an instructor in
three different PREP curricula and leave the conference ready to teach! And,
you learn from the founders themselves, Howard Markman, Scott Stanley, and
Susan Blumberg.  For complete info and to register on-line by May 11th to
get the early-bird rate, visit:
http://www.smartmarriages.com/institutes.html

Bradenton Herald 
May 5, 2007
Boosting marriages
Manatee County agencies teaching relationship skills
By ROBERTA C. NELSON

No one starts a relationship to end up unhappy.

Yet people who once loved each other - and may still love each other -
argue, fight, split up or divorce.

To help couples and teens, Family Resources Inc. is offering six-week
courses for people who want to learn skills to better communicate and keep
the fun in their relationships.

The programs, modeled on the Prevention and Relationship Enhancement
Program, or PREP, are supported by the federal government. A $5 million
five-year grant was awarded to Family Resources Inc. in Manatee and Pinellas
by the Department of Health and Human Services' Administration for Children
and Families to strengthen communities through healthy marriages.

The key word is "healthy," said Jane Parker, mental health counselor and
program director at the Women's Resource Center of Manatee.

The Women's Resource Center is the site of the first workshop, which begins
May 9.

"That's what makes us excited about it," Parker said. "We do have a divorce
workshop, but we also believe in healthy relationships."

While Family Resources is the grant recipient, and will offer the classes
under the name YouandMe.We, the Women's Resource Center also supports the
program.

"It's a valuable program for the health and future of the community," Parker
said.

Parker said many couples need to learn what a healthy relationship looks
like. The PREP course takes a couple through an education process toward
better communication, which is the basis for a healthy and lasting
relationship.

Carol Rosenbaum, a family educator at Family Resources in Bradenton, works
with Rodriguez Perry and Sandi Kaiser, also educators at Family Resources,
to lead all the workshops.

"PREP teaches relationship skills that will increase positive behaviors and
reduce negative behaviors so that the relationship will last a long, long
time, and only get better," Rosenbaum said.

Danger signs that a relationship is headed for trouble include withdrawing
and not talking, misinterpreting comments, outright disrespect and
name-calling.

"Another sign is escalating behavior," Rosenbaum said. "Yelling and then
yelling louder and then hitting. Those kinds of things do damage."

The workshops are open to all committed couples and single teens or teen
couples. The programs designed for teens are especially valuable, Rosenbaum
said.

"The earlier you get a couple learning these skills, the less time there is
to have these destructive patterns develop in a relationship," she said.

The Department of Health and Human Services provides funding for PREP and
other similar programs because many social ills are prevented when couples,
especially married couples with children, stay together.

"Children will do better with both parents in one place - physically,
emotionally, financially," Rosenbaum said. "And the community does better,
because the need for social services is reduced."

Research supporting a public policy that promotes marriage was published in
2002 by the Institute for American Values. "Why Marriage Matters: Twenty-One
Conclusions from the Social Sciences" shows how families with intact
marriages benefit the community through emotional stability, financial
condition, physical health, and a reduction in crime and domestic violence.

Parker emphasized that the couples' workshops are open to any committed
couple, with or without children. The Women's Resource Center is considering
starting PREP workshops for single women and single parents, she said.

"The material is so good, so valuable, that anyone can benefit," Parker
said.

For an extensive bibliography of books, tapes, audio CDs and DVDs, visit
http://www.smartmarriages.com/booklist.html.

Class schedule

Three six-week classes start this month for "Prevention and Relationship
Enhancement Program" (PREP) in Bradenton:

€ May 9 for couples. $40 per couple, includes manual. Women's Resource
Center, 1926 Manatee Ave. W. Registration: 747-6797

€ May 12 for teens. $10 per person, includes lunch. Family Resources Center,
361 Sixth Ave. W. Registration: 741-3850

€ May 22 for couples. $40 per couple, includes manual. Family Resources
Center, 361 Sixth Ave. W. Registration: 741-3850
Roberta C. Nelson, staff writer, can be reached at 748-0411, ext 2121.
© 2007 Bradenton.com and wire service sources. All Rights Reserved.
http://www.bradenton.com

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11th Annual Smart Marriages Conference, Denver Adam's Mark Hotel,
June 28-July 1, 2007
Download a brochure: http://www.smartmarriages.com/Brochure.07.pdf


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http://www.smartmarriages.com
202-362-3332

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