A big TAH DAH!! / I Promise You / Marriage and Sleep Keys to Happiness - 1/11/07

Thu Jan 11 17:57:06 EST 2007

- TAH DAH!!  UTAH SETS ASIDE 1% OF TANF MONEY FOR HEALTHY MARRIAGE
- LATEST WILLARD HARLEY BOOK "I PROMISE YOU"
- MARRIAGE AND A GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP: KEYS TO HAPPINESS

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- TAH DAH!!  UTAH SETS ASIDE 1% OF TANF MONEY FOR HEALTHY MARRIAGE

> Dear Diane, 
> The Utah Department of Workforce Services just announce that it has set aside
> 1% of its TANF funding for Healthy Marriage Initiatives in the state.  This
> will provide approximately $750,000 annually.
> 
> In response to this news, the most common re-action in our state has been
> "Yeee-Hawwww!"  The most common question asked has been "How did they do it?"
> It helps that the Utah Commission on Marriage has been functioning statewide
> since 1998 and is now housed within the Department of Workforce Services!  We
> have worked hard to build credibility and a trust level demonstrating that our
> work is good.  We submitted a five-year objectives plan to the TANF director
> focusing on Research, Services, and Public Awareness.  In short, WE SIMPLY
> ASKED for 1% and provided justification.  If you don't ask, the answer is no.
> 
> I also credit participation with Chris Gersten and the FAMLI network.  I found
> it helpful to participate in the conference calls and learn what other states
> were doing.  FAMLI is a terrific resource for local coalitions whether already
> organized or just getting started.
> 
> Melanie Reese
> Utah Healthy Marriage Initiatives

This is such good news.  Chris Gersten will again present his "1% Solution"
at the Denver Smart Marriages Conference. But don't wait, order the
recording of the session in Atlanta and get inspired.  It was one of the
highest rated sessions and definitely one of the most exciting, full of hope
and promise and "how to".  Included Krista Sisterhen who also "just asked"
in Ohio and got the same 1% set aside of TANF state money.  To order call
800-241-7785 or visit:
http://www.iplaybacksmartmarriages.com

> Session 756-516 on CD or downloadable MP3
> Getting State Money: The 1% Solution
> Chris Gersten, Krista Sisterhen, Mary Myrick
> Learn how to access state marriage money - how to open doors and build
> relationships with state and federal elected and appointed officials.

To read more about this on the archive:
http://lists101.his.com/pipermail/smartmarriages/2006-July/003100.html

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- LATEST WILLARD HARLEY BOOK "I PROMISE YOU"

 do... resolve to have a healthy marriage
BY CHRIS MCNAMARA
Chicago Tribune
January 8, 2007

More couples file for divorce in January than any other month.

That's something to keep in mind, writes marriage counselor Willard F.
Harley Jr. His book "I Promise You: Preparing for a Marriage That Will Last
a Lifetime" (Baker, $17.99), is a guide for engaged couples. It presents
four concepts that are critical to a healthy marriage: care, protection,
honesty and time.

Master these and you won't need Harley's other book, "Surviving an Affair."

1. Make deposits in the bank of love.
A love bank is an emotional tally of how people treat us. Good experiences
deposit love units. Bad experiences withdraw units, leading to hate.

2. Not all emotions are created equal.
"If a man assumes that his wife's most important emotional needs are similar
to his, he will fail miserably when he tries to meet them. A woman will fail
if she makes the same assumption."

3. Talk about those annoying ticks.
Spouses should create lists of their partners' habits they find annoying,
then discuss this list and work toward replacing such behaviors with
non-annoying habits.

4. Negotiations are key to any relationship.
"If you can't come to the negotiating table with a smile on your face, then
pick another time when you are in a better mood."

5. The engagement is the perfect time to practice complete honesty.
"If you hide anything now, you are likely to hide much more later."

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- MARRIAGE AND A GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP: KEYS TO HAPPINESS

London, Jan 8 (ANI): Just what does it take to keep people happy? As it
turns out, the answer is one of the simplest that could exist - marriage,
and a good night's sleep.

A Government study, that set out to find what gives Brits a "sense of
wellbeing", showed that two of the most common answers given by people were
being married, and having enough of sleep.

The study, by researches of the Whitehall Wellbeing Working Group also found
that those people who spend 'more time socialising', chatting with a
neighbour over the fence, having plenty of sex in a steady relationship , as
well as caring out about endangered species also tend to be happier than
others.

"It's shown that married people are happier - so what does that mean for
politics? Does it follow that we should be encouraging people to marry? Is
that the realm of politics...or something that should be left to individual
choice?" the Daily Mail quoted Paul Dolan, professor of economics at
Imperial College in London, as saying.

And if you think that being tall and thin also makes people happy, well then
think again, for what matters most it seems, is being of average height and
weight.

As for what makes people unhappy, well the reasons are just as numerous. The
researchers found that extreme weather tends to get people's spirits down,
as well as being dumped, getting sacked or having to live in a heavily
polluted area.

Here's a list of things that makes most Brits happy, as per the Daily Mail:

1. Being married

2. A good night's sleep

3. Socialising with people

4. Chatting with a neighbour

5. Plenty of sex

6. Caring about endangered species

7. Being of average height and weight (ANI)

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11th Annual Smart Marriages Conference, Denver Adam's Mark Hotel,
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Pre-Conference Training Institutes June 26-28
Post-Conference Training Institutes July 2-3
Details: http://www.smartmarriages.com/conferencedetails.html
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Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education, LLC (CMFCE)
Diane Sollee, Director
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http://www.smartmarriages.com
202-362-3332
cmfce at smartmarriages.com

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