All Marriages | NPR & NY Times- Can This Marriage Be Saved? | Happier | Men's Faces | - 8/14/07

Tue Aug 14 15:06:08 EDT 2007

- ORLANDO
- IF ONLY ALL MARRIAGES COULD BE LIKE THIS
- CAN THIS MARRIAGE BE SAVED?
- MARRIAGE MAKES MOST PEOPLE HAPPIER
- MEN'S FACES AND MARRIAGE

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- ORLANDO

I'm just back from a site-inspection in Orlando scouting for our 2009
conference.  It didn't look promising which is a disappointment - we'd
definitely like to go East in '09.  Though there are also good reasons to do
Texas including the incredible Marriage Education legislation passed this
year. So, I'll continue my search and will also look at north central sites
- Kansas City, St Louis, etc.   Anyway, I'm back in the saddle and will try
to answer emails....though it's busy around here!  The next post was a good
one to come home to, thanks for sending it.  - diane

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- IF ONLY ALL MARRIAGES COULD BE LIKE THIS

Glenn Sacks
MensNewsDaily.com 
If Only All Marriages Could Be Like This...
August 11, 2007

The other day I stopped off at my parents' house on the way to pick my son
up from his friend's house, and my mother asked me for a favor. They had
recently had their carpets cleaned, and the furniture was put back a little
out of place. My parents, who have been married for nearly 45 years, each
have back problems and each have a comfortable, back-friendly reclining
chair, which are placed side by side. My mother wanted me to put the
reclining chairs back exactly where they had been previously carefully
positioned.

Why?

Because my parents like to be able to hold hands when they watch TV
together...

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- CAN THIS MARRIAGE BE SAVED?

I took part this morning in an NPR show "On Point" with Tom Ashbrook that
discussed the New York Times Sunday Magazine front cover article, August 12,
2007, "Can This Marriage Be Saved?" that featured marital group therapy.

I was led to believe I'd be part of a panel but I wasn't brought in until
last ten mins of the hour long discussion.  By that time I was rabid.  It
was discouraging to hear marriage education being referred to as
psychobabble and "less than".  A major struggle as we promote marriage
education is to be clear that it is NOT therapy, and this article and show
will just add to the confusion. I should have been a bit more reasoned but
could see by the clock that I had less than 5 mins.....oh well.

In case you missed it, here is the article:
http://tinyurl.com/329xtb

You can listen to the NPR piece at:
http://www.onpointradio.org/shows/2007/08/20070814_b_main.asp

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- MARRIAGE MAKES MOST PEOPLE HAPPIER

Marriage makes most people 'happier'
The Sydney Morning Herald
August 14, 2007 

Marriage does make most people happier, according to a new study.

Even if around half of all marriages end in divorce, actually tying the knot
is better than living in a de facto partnership or remaining single,
according to Swiss economist Professor Bruno Frey.

"To be married really contributes to happiness," Prof Frey told AAP.

"The reason I see that is that people expect a stronger sense of commitment
which they like and just to have a partner is obviously considered to be
something else."

Professor Frey, of the Department of Economics at the University of Zurich,
Switzerland, is the co-researcher of a study into the relationship between
happiness and marriage which surveyed 15,000 people over 17 years.

The results came as a surprise to Prof Frey, who himself is not married but
lives with his partner - also a professor.

"She doesn't want to get married because she doesn't think it contributes
anything additional and is only putting restrictions on you," he said.

But Prof Frey said that with divorce rates of around 50 per cent in many
western countries, the results of the study were also indicative of a
perceived feeling of commitment and a desire to prolong a relationship.

"People are still happier after 10 years than those who didn't marry but
there is a gradual reduction of happiness," he said.

In contrast to western cultures, where most people marry for romantic love,
the happiness levels of newlyweds in Asian, African and Middle Eastern
cultures do not rise significantly after undergoing arranged marriages.

"There is a very small rise over time in their happiness, so in a way, they
get used to the other person," he said.

Prof Frey is internationally recognised for his work in economics, political
science, sociology and psychology.

He will speak at a Queensland University of Technology (QUT) public lecture
on happiness, something which he said should be in plentiful supply in
Australia, which enjoys close to full employment.

"One of the worst things that make people unhappy is unemployment," he said.

"But here Australia is in a very good situation because your rate of
unemployment is so low."

© 2007 AAP

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- MEN'S FACES AND MARRIAGE

Marriage-Minded Women Focus on Men's Faces
August 13, 2007 

MONDAY, Aug. 13 (HealthDay News) -- When it comes to a woman's choice of a
life-partner, a man's face may mean a lot, a new study finds.

Many women regard men with masculine facial features -- such as a square
jaw, larger nose and smaller eyes -- as unsuitable long-term partners,
because they're more likely to be domineering, unfaithful, unaffectionate
and poor parents, U.K. researchers have found.

On the other hand, women believe that men with finer facial features --
fuller lips, wide eyes and thinner, more curved eyebrows -- to be more
committed, less likely to cheat, and to make better parents, said the study
by psychologists at Durham and St. Andrews Universities.

For this study, British women were asked to view pictures of men's faces
that were digitally altered to look more masculine or feminine and to
predict the men's personality traits, including sexual behavior and
parenting skills.

The findings are published in the current issue of the journal Personality
and Individual Differences.

"This research shows a high amount of agreement between women about what
they see, personality wise, when asked to 'judge a book by its cover.' They
may well use that impression of someone to decide whether or not to engage
with that person. That decision-making process all depends on what a woman
is looking for in a relationship at that time of her life," lead author Dr.
Lynda Boothroyd, a lecturer in the department of psychology at Durham
University, said in a prepared statement.

She and her colleagues said their findings provide new information about
what people see in others when they're selecting potential partners and may
help advance research in areas such as evolutionary biology, fertility and
genetics. It may also offer new insights for use in relationship counseling
and psychology.

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