Good Ole Gramma/ Good Ole Boys/ Good Business Sense - 7/20/06

[Smartmarriages]

- GRAMMA WEEK IN FULL SWING

I realize many of you are frustrated that I'm not getting back to you but
I've got my grandkids here (without their parents) and am totally immersed.
I'll be back at my desk on July 25th. In meantime:
- CEU certificates should reach you by end of July
- Conference refunds will be in mail by end of August
- Conference recordings are all ready and can be ordered on the new PlayBack
website at: http://www.iplaybacksmartmarriages.com/
- I will have the top sellers or the top rated session lists posted by Sept.
- The 2007 conference presenter and Exhibit applications are available on
the website at: http://www.smartmarriages.com/conferencedetails.html
  
 - diane 

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- GOOD OLE BOYS

>> 756-614
>> Marriage Education for Good Ole Boys
>> Jennifer Baker, PsyD, MFT
>> Learn to supplement existing marriage programs with film clips, Country
>> music, humor and stories to engage often neglected low-income white couples.

> Diane is there a telephone # for this recording? - Dennis L

You can order this session on CD or MP3 for $15 at 800-241-7785
Sorry to have left off that info.  - diane

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- STRONG MARRIAGES MAKE GOOD BUSINESS SENSE
By Heather Sells
CBN News
July 19, 2006

> ³Since that retreat back in 2004, guess what? I mean I go to work and I can
> focus on work,² Ty said,
> 
> One of the most important studies on marriage shows how fighting with your
> spouse affects the bottom line. Researchers found that men with the highest
> levels of marital stress will miss 30 more days of work a year than men with
> average stress.


((Note: This show was supposed to air on July 17th on the 700 Club.  Due to
mid-east crisis, it's been bumped to Aug 3.  Reset your Tivo. Here's the
coverage on their website. - diane ))

CBN.com ­Good marriages help grow strong families, but can they help the
bottom-line at work? Anyone who has ever had a bad day at the office after a
bad night at home may know what many business leaders know.

³We would like to say, 'oh, don't bring your personal problems to work. But
that's not realistic and that's not natural,² said Jack Myrick, a marriage
education consultant.

Myrick works for the state of Oklahoma, which has spent more than ten
million dollars in marital education. And other states are following suit,
recognizing that healthy marriages reduce the need for many social services.

But on the business side, it's much more difficult to find companies that
want to invest in encouraging strong marriages.

³We really are stunned at how hard it's been to get corporations to see this
is what they should be doing‹that good strong marriages would be great for
the bottom-line,² said Diane Sollee of the Smart Marriages Coalition.

Enter Truett Cathy‹CEO of Chick-fil-A and maverick of the corporate world
for closing his restaurants on Sunday.

It's been his marriage-friendly policies and programs that have earned him
the spotlight. Smart Marriages, a national coalition of professional and lay
leaders, recently presented Cathy with its first-ever business award.

According to Cathy, promoting marriage doesn't just line up with his
Christian values, it makes business sense as well.

³If a person can't conduct their personal life, you can't expect them to be
a high performer in his business,² said Cathy.

Chick-fil-A's commitment to marriage has grown out of a culture that
supports the family and programs such as on-site daycare.

Cathy himself has been married for 58 years.

The well-known Christian businessman says his Sunday policy has made a big
difference in his marriage and those of his employees.

But Chick-fil-A couples such as the Yokums also appreciate the $30-million
dollars he's poured into a marriage retreat center called Winshape.

Ty and Julie Yokum have been married, happily, for 18 years. But two years
ago, a Chick-fil-A sponsored retreat took their relationship from good to
"wow."

³What we discovered were that there were some holes in our hearts that were
just there from growing up and relationships with parents,² said Ty.

Julie added, ³We've had a deeper, richer understanding. And it would not
have happened‹would not have happened‹without that Winshape retreat. We
probably would still be limping along, trying our best.²

William and Amber Saunders are another couple that have embraced marriage
education. William's financial consulting company in Richmond, Virginia has
sponsored a class, and the Saunders have attended several retreats. Both say
they've learned more about each other and how to express themselves.

³If there's an issue, you can go ahead and talk about what's bothering you,
and the person has to repeat exactly what you said so that you know they
heard exactly what you wanted,² said Amber.

For William, the decision to seek marriage training grew out of his business
philosophy.

He said, ³We're always hiring consultants. We're always hiring some type of
coach and so there is no stereotype to me. I see this as 'Look, I'm going to
apply these same lessons that I've learned in my business life to my
personal life.'²

For Ty, marriage training has directly affected his work.

³Since that retreat back in 2004, guess what? I mean I go to work and I can
focus on work,² Ty said,

One of the most important studies on marriage shows how fighting with your
spouse affects the bottom line. Researchers found that men with the highest
levels of marital stress will miss 30 more days of work a year than men with
average stress.

That same study estimated that marital problems cost the economy $6.8
billion a year. Such costs are a result of both missed days and poor
performance. And it¹s most significant among men in their first ten years of
marriage.

³Women kind of roll with things better than men and there's this irony where
we think of men as stronger and coping better with things, but it's really
just in terms of brute strength that men are stronger. It's not in terms of
emotional strength,² said Dr. Scott Stanley of the University of Denver.

Research also shows that kids and grown-ups are more likely to have mental
and physical problems when there's marital stress. Those kinds of issues can
end up costing companies.

³Things just go better when there's a marriage‹a couple and they work
together well. Everybody does better in every area of life,² said Stanley.

He argues that long-term research shows established marriage curricula have
clear benefits.

By learning how to handle conflict and communicate well, couples can improve
the chance that their relationship will survive. And that means a lot today,
when newlyweds face a 40 to 50 percent chance of divorcing.

So why aren't more companies following Chick-fil-A's lead? Myrick says they
fear offending singles.

³There may be people in there that are experiencing divorce or [who've] had
a bitter divorce. Or maybe there's the group of single parents that don't
want to be married or the singles that don't want to be married or they may
have some homosexuals that are in their organization,² said Myrick.

Ty says workers also have fears‹especially about what co-workers might
think.

He said, ³People go 'oh wow. What's wrong with them? Something's wrong with
their marriage?' And so you can be influenced by peers that way.²

But as Chick-fil-A has demonstrated, retreats and other perks have given
them the edge in attracting new staff. The company¹s 3.5 percent turnover
rate is legendary compared to the 73 percent national fast food average.

And with national recognition from its award, chick-fil-a says doors are
opening. Leaders are asking Cathy how healthy marriages make good business
sense.

³Possibly companies need to wake up to the fact that they need to spend the
effort and money to help maintain a stability and quality of people who are
performing well,² said Cathy.

Ty said, ³If I was a business leader I'd have to say, 'This is an investment
in people' and I think Truett's already understood that from a long time
ago‹that when you make that investment in people, the returns are amazing.²


**************************
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10th Annual Smart Marriages Conference, Atlanta Marriott Marquis Hotel,
June 22-25, 2006
Download the brochure and registration form at
http://www.smartmarriages.com/Brochure.06.pdf

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http://www.iPlaybackSmartMarriages.com

Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education, LLC (CMFCE)
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