GRAY: Hunger/Glass/Isoflex - 7/06/06

[Smartmarriages]

- HUNGER MAKES THE HEART GROW GRUMPIER
- IRA GLASS: SPEAKING OF JOHN GRAY
- ISOFLEX EXERCISE DVD

###############################

- HUNGER MAKES THE HEART GROW GRUMPIER
Nutrient shortage affects mood

By HELENA OLIVIERO
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
JULY 5, 2006

In a cosmic shift, John Gray ‹ the Mars/Venus communications guru ‹ suggests
that listening to your spouse's feelings might not do you a lick of good.

If your sweetie's upset or crabby, don't assume he or she feels unloved or
unheard, suggests Gray.

Your partner might just be hungry.

"Let's say you are going down the highway and your wife suggests, 'Maybe we
could look for a restaurant in a little bit, honey,' " Gray said recently.
"That is a code blue alert ‹ an emergency. Her blood sugar has dropped, and
she will suffer temporary amnesia. She won't remember anything good you've
ever done, and she will look at you like you are the biggest loser in the
world."

Gray, author of "Men are From Mars, Women are from Venus," built his
reputation exploring gender differences, is turning his attention to the
role of food and exercise in relationships.

His message: Keeping your tummy comfy can also stave off a fight with your
loved one.

Gray's theories aren't new or revolutionary. But many couples overlook the
connection, some experts say.

Dr. Vicki Rackner, a clinical instructor at the University of Washington
School of Medicine, says many people ignore the early signs of hunger. Sugar
lows and hunger often manifest as irritability, moodiness or being snappy,
she said.

"If you are thinking, 'How many times do I have to ask him I need to get
that towel off the floor?' you may just be hungry," she said.

Of course, Gray believes Mars works differently from Venus. He contends
women are far more sensitive to sugar lows, encouraging men to identify
warning signs and keep healthy snacks handy (like cherries and popcorn,
rather than a chocolate bar).

He said men, on the other hand, more easily suffer from dopamine
deficiencies, which can make them vulnerable to addictions and driving over
the speed limit. He suggests men need a morning exercise routine and foods
rich in protein such as eggs, fish and yogurt.

Rackner, however, believes dietary needs vary more by person and not
necessarily along gender lines. For example, she said her body responds well
to snacking on almonds, pistachios and dried fruits, but others ‹ male or
female ‹ can get more energy from eating carrots and popcorn.

Dr. Beth Seelig, director of the Psychoanalytic Institute at Emory
University, recommends couples should have fun with food and get to know
their lover's individuals tastes.

Even sitting across from your honey during dinner is a form of foreplay, she
said. Making your loved one a favorite dish is a bonus.

"I make my husband zucchini soup, and other people think it's strange, but
he loves it," she said.

Jessica Frickey of Atlanta said she and her fiancé have learned that food
can help them avoid an argument.

"When we were vacationing in Europe some years ago, a light bulb went off,"
said Frickey, a 26-year-old public relations executive. "We found ourselves
always having the same arguments ‹ around meal times."

Now if she's feeling a little testy, she grabs a snack like cheese and
crackers.

Gray also suggests starting the day with a lemon tonic ‹ a combination of
lemon juice, water, honey aloe vera juice and trace amounts of minerals. On
his Web site, he lists a recipe for the Mars Venus Supershake.

Of course, food needs change given the relationship temperature. Rackner
said if she and her husband are having a conflict, she brings home some
chocolate, his favorite treat.

"If there's a crisis like someone is having a temper tantrum ‹ and adults
can have temper tantrums ‹ go for sugar or candy," she said.

TUMMY TIPS
€ Notice subtle signs of hunger and discuss them with your partner.
€ Keep healthy snacks handy, such as sunflower seeds and apples.
€ If you're grumpy or irritable, ask yourself if you just need to eat.
€ Don't let hunger provoke a fight. ‹ John Gray, Vicki Rackner

A recipe from John Gray ‹ Mars Venus Supershake (one serving)
€ Nonhydrolyzed milk whey: 17 grams for men, 12 grams for women
€ Ground flax: 1 tablespoon for men, 2 tablespoons for women
€ 3 almonds
€ 1 apple
€ One or two teaspoons of molasses

Combine all ingredients in blender. Mix until creamy.

##########################
- IRA GLASS: SPEAKING OF JOHN GRAY

> Diane,
>   
> So, from water to supplements.... you and Carol peaked my curiosity!
>   
> By the way, speaking of Gray...did you hear Ira Glass's This American Life
> this past weekend? An incredibly heart-warming story of an immigrant Iranian
> or Iraqi family transplanted to America.....the mother finally leaves the
> tyrant father and although the daughters fret most about their father.....he
> finds John Gray's book about Mars and Venus and devours it. In fact it changes
> his life, his perspective, he finally understands the misery of his wife. As a
> couple they are finally reunited--to the grown childrens' delight. It's a
> great story!!
>   
> Marline Pearson
> LoveU2 Program 
> 

############################
- ISOFLEX EXERCISE DVD

Dear Diane,

John Gray also has a video/DVD called the "Extended Isoflex Routine" which
is a wonderful way to get your energy up for the day. It starts out slow and
gentle and gradually gets more vigorous at the end. My 81 year old mother
loves it and I find it deeply calming as well as energizing. Two years ago,
at age 51, I had both my hips replaced (Aug) and then both knees (Dec); I
can still do almost everything in the routine. You have to search a bit on
his website to find it.
Janine M. Lund, PhD, MFT


**************************
Send replies to this newslist to: diane at smartmarriages.com  Do not hit
"reply" - that goes to a filter.  This is a moderated list. Replies are read
by Diane Sollee, editor. Please indicate if your response is NOT to be
shared with the list.  PLEASE include your email address with your
signature. 

To SUBSCRIBE, UNSUBSCRIBE, or Change your subscription address,
use the form at: http://www.smartmarriages.com. Click Newslist - in the
column under the puzzle piece.

This newslist shares information on marriage, divorce and educational
approaches.  Opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by members of the
Coalition.

To read ALL past posts to the newsletter, visit the Archive at:
http://archives.his.com/smartmarriages/

10th Annual Smart Marriages Conference, Atlanta Marriott Marquis Hotel,
June 22-25, 2006
Download the brochure and registration form at
http://www.smartmarriages.com/Brochure.06.pdf

List your program in the Directory of Classes at
http://www.smartmarriages.com
Order conference audio & video CD/DVD/MP3s: 800-241-7785 or
http://www.iPlaybackSmartMarriages.com

Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education, LLC (CMFCE)
Diane Sollee, Director
5310 Belt Rd NW, Washington, DC 20015-1961
http://www.smartmarriages.com
202-362-3332
cmfce at smartmarriages.com

FAIR USE NOTICE: This e-newsletter/site contains copyrighted material the
use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright
owner. We make such material available in our efforts to advance
understanding of marriage, family, couples, divorce, legislation, family
breakdown, etc. We understand this constitutes a 'fair use' of such material
as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with
Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed
without profit to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the
included information for research and educational purposes. For more
information go to: http://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/17/107.shtml. If you
wish to use copyrighted material from this site for purposes of your own
that go beyond 'fair use', you must obtain permission from the copyright
owner.