Successful Stepmothers/On-Line/Radio Shack/Military/Prisons - 4/05

[smartmarriages at lists101.his.com]

- FIRST-HAND EXPERIENCES WITH ON-LINE MFT EDUCATION
- SUCCESSFUL STEPMOTHERS??
- WHAT TO OFFER MILITARY FAMILIES
- ALL KINDS OF GRANT MONEY IN ALL KINDS OF PLACES
- MARRIAGE PROGRAMS TRY TO INSTILL BLISS AND STABILITY BEHIND BARS

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- FIRST-HAND EXPERIENCES WITH ON-LINE MFT EDUCATION

Diane,
I completed my Master's Degree online through Southern Christian University
(www.southernchristian.edu). It was an outstanding program and I feel well
prepared having experienced it. The entire degree can be completed online,
however students must obtain qualified supervision for practicum locally.
Some courses also strongly encourage an on-site component. If anyone would
like more details, feel free to contact me, dean at ktc.com.
Dean Fitch
--------------
> Dear Diane,
> In reference to online MFT program have folks check the following website:
> http://www.southernchristian.edu/
>  
> This is a fine program located in Montgomery, Al.  I am currently working
> towards an MDiv in MFT at this school.
> Harold Letson

#######################
- SUCCESSFUL STEPMOTHERS??

This is a chance to spread hope as you share your stories about how marriage
education skills/classes/knowledge HELPED you adjust your expectations and
skill your way through.  Please contact her.  Let me know how it goes. I see
she is doing due diligence and has registered for both the pre and post
conference Stepfamily training Institutes and all the stepfamily workshops
in Dallas.    - diane

> Hi Diane!   
> I am so looking forward to this summer's conference! Thank you so much for
> sharing your generous time with me a few months back to talk about
> stepfamilies. I'm moving ahead on my book A Career Girl's Guide to Becoming a
> Stepmom, which HarperCollins purchased earlier this year. Currently I am
> looking to interview stepmoms who entered their marriage with no kids of their
> own. I would love to interview women at all stages of stepfamily development,
> but particularly those who consider themselves success stories.  Anyone
> interested can contact me at jacquebfletcher at aol.com or 612-722-5873. Thanks
> again and see you in June!
> Jacquelyn Fletcher

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- WHAT TO OFFER MILITARY FAMILIES


Chaplain (LTC) Larry Woods, an Army Chaplain currently serving in Germany,
is a certified COUPLE COMMUNICATION (CC) Instructor and says soldiers and
their spouses attend CC retreats to help them with re-entry to life outside
Iraq.  He writes:

"All of the couples taking COUPLE COMMUNICATION have been separated from
family members at least a year (including me).  We are dealing with "anger"
issues more than anything else.  Coming back from the desert has increased
short-fused situations and escalated the onset of anger, which leads to
either shutting down or acting out.  The course gives choices to our couples
and is just the right education model to increase communication. I also
offer CC II, which deals specifically with anger.

I have another chaplain who is helping me.  We are only taking seven couples
through the program at a time and always have a waiting list.  It is going
better than ever.  Our feedback is super.  Thank you for introducing me to
this fabulous course."

Chaplain Woods also is certified in CORE COMMUNICATION, which he teaches to
soldiers who are single.

You can become a qualified instructor in all the Couples Communications
programs at the Dallas Smart Marriages Conference - and study with the
founders/creators of the program:

> 107 Two Days - Wed & Thurs, June 22 & 23, Dallas
> COUPLE COMMUNICATION I & II and
> CORE COMMUNICATION for Singles
> Sherod Miller, PhD & Phyllis Miller, PhD, Program Developers
> Learn to teach three practical programs to help couples (and singles) increase
> self and other awareness, map their relationship, learn talking, listening &
> conflict resolution skills, align values and goals, and manage anger. Practice
> with real issues using innovative and engaging skills mats. Special attention
> to using skills mats with low income couples. Marketing and practice-building
> strategies. Couple Packets, Core Workbook and Instructor. Manual included.
> $100 spouse discount. Click for more information.
> 

You can also be certified in Dallas as instructors in many other programs
currently being used with Military couples including PREP and C-PREP, PAIRS
and Christian PAIRS, Relationship Enhancement, Family Wellness, 7 Habits of
Healthy Marriages, Active Relationships, How to Avoid Marrying a Jerk,
Compassion Workshops, etc etc etc.  See the institute page for details:
http://www.smartmarriages.com/institutes.html

And, here are just a few of the Dallas conference workshops that will focus
on Military marriages:

> 215
> 7 Habits of Highly Effective Military Families
> John Covey, EdD, MBA
> This experiential, activities-based program helps couples face the challenges
> of parenting, communicating and staying connected before, during and after
> deployment.

> 507 - Sat June 25
> Great Military Marriages
> Katherine Robredo, MSW, Maureen Griner, MA
> Learn strategies to help military couples face the trauma of separations and
> reunions -- stay connected, restore intimacy, manage PTSD. Add to any marriage
> program or teach as a stand alone.

######################
- ALL KINDS OF GRANT MONEY IN ALL KINDS OF PLACES

Paula DeBoles-Johnson, recipient of this Radio-Shack community grant aimed
at "keeping children safe", attended the Dallas 2004 Smart Marriages
Conference. "Grants are accepted year round and evaluated quarterly.

Local Nonprofit Receives Grant from RadioShack Corporation

Capital City Youth Development Corporation- Tallahassee, Florida
among 145 agencies chosen to receive grant money form the company's
StreetSentz Community Grants Program

Fort Worth, Texas-February 21, 2005 - As part of its continuing effort to
improve the quality of life for America's families, Radio Shack Corporation
has awarded Capital City Youth Development Corporation a Community Grant.
Capital City Youth Development Corporation is one of 145 agencies to receive
grant money in the latest quarterly cycle of RadioShack's StreetSentz
Community Grants Program.  The program funds worthy causes that help
families protect children from abduction, violence and abuse.

"Through the StreetSentz Community Grants program, RadioShack has the
ability to support programs in local communities that aim to help keep
children safe." said Laura Moore, senior vice president and chief
communications officer for RadioShack Corporation.  "We believe our
contributions to agencies like Capital City Youth Development Corporation
will positively impact families across the nation, reinforcing RadioShack's
commitment to the safety and security of the American Family."

"We are certainly appreciative of Radio Shack's commitment to the youth and
families in Leon County", said Paula DeBoles-Johnson, Executive Director of
the Capital City Youth Development Corporation. "In these perilous times it
will take a combined effort to protect our young people from maltreatment."

Community Grants are accepted year-round and are evaluated quarterly by
local review councils coordinated through RadioShacks district offices.
Grants are awarded quarterly in February, May, August and November.
########################
- MARRIAGE PROGRAMS TRY TO INSTILL BLISS AND STABILITY BEHIND BARS
The New York Times 
April 16, 2005
By RICK LYMAN 

This article on the Oklahoma Marriage Initiative's efforts to systemically
tackle divorce and family breakdown in schools, congregations and
communities across the state focuses on one of their more recent strategies
-- delivering marriage education skills in prisons.  Initially, it was
thought they would offer the PREP program to "soon-to-be released" inmates.
Do to the positive effects of teaching communication and self-regulation
skills, the program has been expanded to include those who aren't near their
release dates -- or who will never be released.  Howard Markman will present
a keynote, "Doing Time" at the Dallas Smart Marriages conference on the
obvious good sense of providing marriage skills to this population.  He'll
also be part of a workshop that will also feature marriage education inmate
programs in Florida and Tennessee -- in county jails as well as in prisons.
- diane 

> Doing Time - SAT, JUNE 25, DALLAS
> Howard Markman, PhD, Ron Grant, MDiv, Richard Albertson, Rozario Slack, DMin
> Ex-offenders with successful intimate relationships are less likely to
> re-offend. Learn about three programs teaching marriage skills to inmates and
> how to adapt programs for your community.

        
OKLAHOMA CITY, April 12 - Marriage anxiety has gripped much of the
heartland, and in Oklahoma it has reached into the cellblock in perhaps the
most unexpected permutation of the state's six-year effort to bolster wedded
bliss.
 
In the Joseph Harp Correctional Center, sprawling across the tawny plains 40
miles south of Oklahoma City, officials are running a six-part course on
maintaining a healthy marriage, available for the last year or so to inmates
in good standing.
 
"There are 600,000 Americans leaving prison in the next few years," the
human services director, Howard H. Hendrick, said in explaining the effort
to teach felons to be good spouses. "And those guys are all coming to an
apartment complex near you." . . .

. . . State officials say there is more than compassion in their decision to
take the program into cells, as well. The prison chaplain, Ron Grant,
pointed to a recent study of 524 California parolees.
 
"When they looked at all the factors affecting whether the inmate returned
to prison," he said, "the No. 1 factor, more than drugs, more than race,
more than any other demographic category, was whether they were part of a
stable family relationship."

. . . .The curriculum was developed by two Colorado researchers, Howard
Markham and Scott Stanley, and focuses on communications skills, teaching
people to slow down and listen to one another before disputes mutate into
arguments.

One instructor is Aaron Cosar, 19 years into a life sentence for
first-degree murder and an assistant to the chaplain. He went through the
course two years ago when it was a pilot program and credits it for making
his marriage so important that he celebrates not one, but five
anniversaries.

And, check out this stat:

> Between a married man's arrest and the end of his first year in prison, 80
> percent of marriages break up, Mr. Grant said. For female inmates, the divorce
> rate is closer to 100 percent, he said.

Note, this is prison and not jail, but still, this is a daunting stat.  I
wonder if we could help by offering the programs during that first year. - d

To read the complete article go to:
http://www.nytimes.com/2005/04/16/national/16marriage.html?
 
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9th Annual Smart Marriages Conference, Adam's Mark Dallas June 23 - 26, 2005
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