Broken Marriages, Not Gay Nuptials, Pose Risk to Kids -2/04

[Smart Marriages ®]

subject: Broken Marriages, Not Gay Nuptials, Pose Risk to Kids -2/04

from: Smart Marriages®

Thanks to all of you who sent in these editorials and the many articles
about the same sex marriage debate.  I'll share these two from today's USA
TODAY which I agree pretty much sum up the positions and concerns, but then
I again direct you to the lively on-going discussion of these issues at the
familyscholars.org and marriagedebate.org BLOGS.  We'll feature a roundtable
discussion of how the same sex marriage issue fits in the context of our
marriage education efforts at the Dallas conference led by Maggie Gallagher
and Bill Doherty but this list is going to stay focused on improving and
increasing the availability of marriage and relationship skills programs in
the community and on research, funding, training, on school/youth education
programs, on Community Healthy Marriage Initiatives and CMPs, on reducing
family breakdown and increasing marriage and parenting stability, not on
this debate.    - diane

> 417 - Saturday, July 10, Dallas
> Same Sex Marriage (SSM): A Discussion
> Maggie Gallagher, Bill Doherty, PhD
> How might SSM weaken or strengthen marriage as an institution? Split the
> marriage movement? How (if at all) should the movement engage the issue? How
> can it not? 

- BROKEN MARRIAGES, NOT GAY NUPTIALS, POSE RISK TO KIDS
- OPPOSING VIEW: PRESERVE MARRIAGE'S MESSAGE

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- BROKEN MARRIAGES, NOT GAY NUPTIALS, POSE RISK TO KIDS

USA Today 
Editorial
February 23, 2004 

> Instead, a long line of respected studies on families points to a far more
> common reason that children increasingly are put at risk: the breakup of
> heterosexual marriages. Yet by focusing their efforts on fighting gay
> marriage, amendment sponsors divert attention from the broken homes that
> create challenges for the young.


Broken marriages, not gay nuptials, pose risk to kids

As protestors chanted ''no discrimination'' outside Massachusetts' state
capitol earlier this month, name-calling legislators bickered over the terms
of a new law that would govern gay marriages.

On the West Coast, hundreds of gay couples lined up outside San Francisco's
City Hall last week after the mayor granted them marriage licenses in
apparent violation of California law. State officials promptly vowed to
challenge the move in court.

Those tumultuous scenes are precursors to the battle heating up in
Washington over a drive for a federal marriage amendment that would rewrite
the Constitution to forbid same-sex marriage.

If amendment promoters plan to subject the nation to the type of inflamed
disputes occurring in Boston and San Francisco, they need a powerful reason.
And they offer a compelling one: protecting children. They say letting gays
marry will hurt children by weakening the institution of marriage.

Considerable evidence does document that children face fewer problems when
married mothers and fathers bring them up. But even the most ardent
opponents of gay marriage concede their claims that gay unions will hurt
children are based on supposition and anecdotal evidence. Scientific studies
about the impact of gay unions on traditional families are lacking.

Instead, a long line of respected studies on families points to a far more
common reason that children increasingly are put at risk: the breakup of
heterosexual marriages.

Yet by focusing their efforts on fighting gay marriage, amendment sponsors
divert attention from the broken homes that create challenges for the young.

A large body of research concludes that children growing up in single-parent
homes suffer education failures, lawlessness, drug use and suicide at rates
two to three times those of children raised by married parents.

Data collected by two family-policy think tanks, the Institute for American
Values and the Center for Law and Social Policy, show:

* Boys raised in single-parent homes are twice as likely to commit a crime
that leads to prison by the time they reach 30, according to a study
presented at a 1998 meeting of the American Psychological Association.

* Children who grow up with a divorced parent are twice as likely to divorce
as adults, according to an article in the Journal of Marriage and the Family
in 2000.

* Children growing up in single-parent families are twice as likely to drop
out of school, according to a 1994 study published by the Urban Institute.

If amendment sponsors want to protect children, as they claim, they can
focus more on embracing marriage-building proposals from family experts. The
Institute for American Values says these include better child-support
enforcement, more marriage counseling, added tax incentives to encourage
low-income workers to marry and divorce reforms such as mandatory waiting
periods.
 
Supporters of the amendment say legalizing gay marriage will make the
institution less attractive to heterosexual couples. But that conclusion is
based on conjecture.

Before they create a coast-to-coast uproar, amendment backers owe the nation
proof that the drastic constitutional step they favor truly would make life
better for children.Today's debate: Same-sex marriageChallenge of growing
single-parent homes is overshadowed by debate.

------------------
- OPPOSING VIEW: PRESERVE MARRIAGE'S MESSAGE

USA Today editorial page
Feb 23, 2004 
Opposing view: Kids do best with mother, father: Amendment will protect
that. 


Preserve marriage's message

By Dick Richardson

> Decades of studies have shown that kids do best when raised by a mother and a
> father. Men and women bring unique and complementary gifts when they unite to
> parent. . . . . Children instinctively seek a connection to both halves of the
> human race. 

I represent the largest organization in New England that serves as a voice
for the African-American community on social issues. I also serve in the
Alliance for Marriage (AFM) along with civil-rights leaders who marched with
Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and leaders of several of the largest
African-American denominations in the nation.

The African-American community played a central role in the formation of the
Alliance for Marriage because of the damage to our community caused by the
disintegration of the family. We were subjected to a system of slavery based
upon the destruction of families. As a result, our community always has been
among the first in America to feel the impact of larger social or cultural
trends that lessen the chance of children being raised in intact families.
Our young men are deprived of male role models. Our young women are deprived
of fathers who can model non-sexual male affection as well as commitment
between the two genders.

Decades of studies have shown that kids do best when raised by a mother and
a father. Men and women bring unique and complementary gifts when they unite
to parent. This is the reason AFM has built a movement of diverse
communities united around a common vision for seeing more children raised in
a home with a mother and a father. And we are active on a wide range of
reforms to encourage marriage and provide intact families for kids.

As founders of a minority social-service agency, my wife and I also have
served as foster parents to more than 50 inner-city children. We have found
that every child has an innate need to connect with a mother and father.
Children instinctively seek a connection to both halves of the human race.

Americans know it's common sense that marriage is the union of a male and a
female. But activists have used the courts in my state to strike down our
marriage laws -- and they soon will do so nationally in the name of the
federal Constitution. This is a constitutional problem that demands a
constitutional response.

Our marriage laws are a teacher and a road map for the next generation.
AFM's marriage amendment is essential if our laws are to send a positive
message to children about marriage, family and their future.

Dick Richardson is political affairs director for the Black Ministerial
Alliance of Boston.


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