FREE Grant workshops/Epstein reply/Marriage Week Celebrations-2/03

Thu Feb 13 13:35:23 EST 2003

subject: FREE Grant workshops/Epstein reply/Marriage Week Celebrations-2/03

from: Smart Marriages®

#######################
- FREE HHS/ACF GRANT WORKSHOPS IN MARCH:

"The Administration for Children and Families' Office of Community Services
(OCS) is hosting three free one-day conferences next month intended to
showcase OCS programs.  The conferences will provide participants with
important information about OCS programs, priorities for 2003 including
family strengthening, and the federal grants process.  The conferences will
be held in Baltimore on March 17, in Chicago on March 20, and in San
Francisco on March 26.  OCS expects to make available more than $100 million
available in FY 2003 for programs intended to build the capacity of
low-income Americans and to build healthy communities.  To find out more
information about the conferences and to register online, please visit the
following web site:  www.ocsconference.net   Space is limited so sign up
today."

(Note: These are totally different than the free grant writing workshops
provided by the Institute for Youth Development that I sent to the list
Tuesday -http://archives.his.com/smartmarriages/msg02266.html.  Go to either
- or, if you're lucky enough to be able to,
attend both. - diane)

########################

- ROBERT EPSTEIN REPLY TO CATHERINE SCOTT:

I have never suggested that any two people can learn to love each other or
that Americans should adopt the practice of arranged marriage.  I have only
said that arranged marriages can teach us something, namely, that it's
possible to learn to love.  A study by Gupta and Singh, published in the
1980s, suggests that love in arranged marriage starts out very low but can
increase gradually over a period of years, surpassing that of romantic
marriages after about five years (partly because love in romantic marriages
declines steadily, as many studies have shown).  I never set out to show
that some random person and I could learn to love each other.  I was hoping
to find - and did find - someone with whom I was compatible and with whom I
shared some attraction.  Attraction provides a motivation to work on the
relationship, but it's not in itself a legitimate basis for a long-term
relationship, since it fades rapidly.  Gabriela and I certainly felt drawn
to each other, intellectually and otherwise, but what's unique is that we
then decided not to leave the rest to chance.  Having known each other for
only a few days, we agreed to sign a Love Contract (available at
www.psychologytoday.com, not to date others, and to undergo intensive
counseling and to use other methods (a) to achieve a high degree of
psychological and emotional intimacy (in other words, to find out who,
exactly, this person is that we're attracted to), (b) to master a long list
of essential relationship skills, and (c) to achieve a deep and lasting
love.  She then returned to Venezuela for a month, and we continued to
discuss this idea from afar.  Now we're ready to sign and move forward with
the process.  Without this framework, we might or might not have tried to
see each other again - that's not at all clear; but within this framework,
it seems fairly likely we'll achieve our goals and create a stable and
loving long-term relationship.  Only time, of course, will tell.

Robert Epstein, Ph.D.
Editor-in-Chief, Psychology Today
University Research Professor, California School of Professional
Psychology at Alliant International University

TO READ the Catherine Scott comment:
http://archives.his.com/smartmarriages/msg02267.html
#################
- MARRIAGE WEEK IN LOUISIANA:

Dear Diane:
A couple married 81 years (82 on July 20) were honored (he is 101, will be
102 on March 3 and she is 98 living in an assisted living place) today by
the Catholic Life Center and the Louisiana Commission on Marriage and
Family.  They lost their only son when he was 25.  They have been together
yet otherwise alone for a very long time.  Their story is so remarkable but
it was their faith (both are Catholic and of French heritage) that kept them
together.  He sang (twice) "Let Me Call You Sweetheart".  I can't tell you
what a tremendous lift it gave me.

Katherine Spaht
###################

- OKLAHOMA MARRIAGE WEEK: SWEETHEARTS WEEKEND -

This Valentine¹s Day, Oklahoma couples will be equipped with tools to
preserve and protect their love and commitment. In conjunction with Marriage
Week USA, the Oklahoma Marriage Initiative (OMI) offered a FREE marriage
education workshop to 350 couples. The co-founders of the Prevention and
Relationship Enhancement Program (PREP), Drs. Scott Stanley and Howard
Markman, and author Natalie Jenkins, taught attendees the basic ingredients
for a happy marriage: friendship, commitment and the skills to communicate
without fighting.  

This mega-workshop, Sweethearts Weekend, was the first of its kind in
Oklahoma and the response was overwhelming - the number of participants was
only limited by space.  Many couples attempted to register several days
prior to the workshop only to discover the workshop was completely full. The
wait-listed couples were referred to numerous other PREP workshops being
delivered across the state by OMI-trained professionals.

Oklahoma couples were not the only ones attracted to Sweethearts Weekend.  A
producer and crew for CBS News Sunday Morning attended the workshop in
preparation for a 10-12 minute segment on marriage strengthening efforts
scheduled to air nationally Sunday, February 16th between 9:00 a.m. and
10:30 a.m. 

#######################
- ST LOUIS - MARRAIGE WEEK:

In St. Louis, Jim and Nancy Landrum who will present at the Reno Smart
Marriages conference, will be interviewed on 97.1 FM Talk Fri, Feb 14th at
about 4:30 p.m. on "What Men and Women Really Want for Valentine's Day."

######################
- CHATTANOOGA CELEBRATES MARRIAGE WEEK

n  e  w  s   r  e  l  e  a  s  e

February 2003

CONTACT: Heather Wilson - 267-5383

WHAT: National Marriage Week
WHEN: February 7-14, 2003
       Marriage Sunday, February 16

Chattanooga Celebrates National Marriage Week

During the month of February as many couples are thinking about red roses,
candlelight dinners and chocolates, First Things First is encouraging local
faith based institutions to honor married couples in their congregations and
couples to celebrate their own marriage.

National Marriage Week is celebrated in faith based institutions and
communities across the country during February 7 - 14. The purpose of the
week is to celebrate the importance of marriage in communities.

FTF suggests faith based institutions hold a vow renewal service; honor
couples who have been married for a number of years; establish a marriage
and family council; or preach a sermon on the importance of strong marriages
and families. 

Local African American churches and the Hamilton County Baptist association
have also marked Sunday, February 16 as Marriage Sunday.

Chattanooga Mayor Bob Corker and Hamilton County Executive Claude Ramsey
have both signed proclamations announcing the week and urging husbands and
wives in the community to "reflect upon their relationship and commit to
building and maintaining a healthy, loving marriage and family."

"Our hope is that faith based institutions and couples will place an
emphasis on marriage during this month when love abounds," said Julie
Baumgardner, executive director of FTF.

###############

**************************
Copyright © 2002 CMFCE. All rights reserved.

To SUBSCRIBE or UNSUBSCRIBE, or Change your subscription address,
use the form on our website (http://www.smartmarriages.com). Do not reply to
this email. On the website, click Newsletter.

Please respect our copyright. If you wish to use any of our content send an
email and request permission.

This newslist shares information on marriage, divorce and  educational
approaches.  Opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by members of the
Coalition.

Newsletter archive - to read ALL posts to the newsletter:
http://archives.his.com/smartmarriages/index.html#start

7th annual Smart Marriages conference/RENO, Nevada
June 26-29, 2003  http://www.smartmarriages.com/conferencedetails.html

Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education, LLC (CMFCE)
Diane Sollee, Director
5310 Belt Rd NW,   Washington, DC 20015-1961
www.smartmarriages.com
202-362-3332 FAX 202-362-0973
cmfce at smartmarriages.com