URGENT cohabitation request/DAADS/Connections/Foundations/

Fri Jul 7 10:34:46 EDT 2000

subject: URGENT cohabitation request/DAADS/Connections/Foundations/

from: Smart Marriages 

A wire-service reporter is doing a conference follow-up piece
on cohabitation and needs couples to interview.  He'd like both
never-married who are either engaged, considering marriage or not,
and those who are divorced and, once bitten, living together instead
of remarrying.  

Please email me if you - or someone you know - are willing to be
 interviewed and where you can be reached via email or by phone.....
and some of the particulars.
  Need this by end of day today, July 9th.  - diane 

_____________________
Hi Diane,

Wanted to let you know what an "awesome" conference in Denver. I learned 
so 
much and came back with some great resources. The Plenary speakers were 
fantastic. I was very moved by Dr. Hargrave's presentation - awesome!

Thanks for ALL your hard work to make this possible! 

Norma Tilton

Obviously, we're back.  The conference was "awesome" and I just want
to thank that hundreds of presenters, attendees & volunteers for making 
it so. 
Every session - including the marriage statement press
conference - was audiotaped.  Get an order form at 800-241-7785.  
- diane

---------------- Begin Forwarded Message ----------------

Dear Diane,

Thanks again for another outstanding conference. It is the most 
professional and enriching gathering I attend each year. The clergy/laity 
meetings each morning were a real treat - hope they continue.

 Would you please ask your readership to contact me via e-mail if 
they have or use a newly married program that works. Kathy and I are 
writing 
a manual on newly married ministry for the National Association of 
Catholic 
Family Life Ministers and we are having trouble finding successful models 
to 
include.

Steve Beirne, SKPubs at aol.com
(Note: Steve & Kathy edit the Foundations Newsletter. See CMFCE Directory 
of programs for information and link.)  

____________________
Diane, 
Is there a way to obtain a copy of the CONNECTIONS curriculum?  I am a 
pastoral counselor in upstate New York who would love to take such a 
program 
into our school system.  As a therapist, I am dealing with the 
adolescents 
left in the wake of broken marriages.  Thank you in advance.
Dean S Flemming II, M.Div., CASAC, ACHT

Yes, here is the Connections info from the CMFCE web site Directory:

CONNECTIONS Youth Relationship Skills Series - 
Dating and Emotions and Relationships and Marriage 
Help teens prepare for healthy dating relationships and successful 
marriages with these programs developed by Charlene Kamper, MA,
CFLE, an experienced teacher. They are skill-based, interactive and 
ready-to-use.  Contents: Self-understanding and self-esteem; Healthy
dating relationships and signs of potentially abusive relationships; 
Effective communication and conflict resolution skills; An awareness of 
the
skills needed for a successful marriage. Appropriate for schools and 
youth groups. FREE sample lessons available! Instructor kit - $95. 
Kay Reed 
The Dibble Fund for Marriage Education 
Box 7881 
Berkeley, California 94707-0881 
800-695-7975 or 510-528-7975 
Email: DibbleFund at aol.com 

Visit the CMFCE web site link on School and Youth Programs for additional 
youth curricula. 

_____________________
There will be a natinal satellite broadcast on marriage and couples
education on September 7, 2000.  The satellite is a project of the 
National
Extension Marriage and Couples Education Work Group with funding from the
American Association for Family and Consumer Sciences, National Extension
Association for Family and Consumer Sciences, and Texas A & M Agricultural
Extension Service Family and Consumer Science program. 
For details and registration information, please visit the following web
site:
http://www.cyfernet.org/parent/marreduc.html
_____________________

This is from Aaron Larson's Dads at a Distance Newsletter: 

I just got back from a week long conference and I thought I would share 
one of 
the activities that I did while I was away for my 2 year old son.

Just before I left I took him to the grocery store and he got to pick out 
a 
package of cookies.  Whenever he was having a hard time my wife would ask 
him 
if he wanted a cookie from dad and then she would pull down the cookies 
for 
him.

It's a simple activity but it reminds your child that you are thinking 
about 
him or her.  If you are already gone you can send home a box of cookies 
to 
accomplish this activity.

I also wanted to share a story with you about why it is so important to 
do 
long distance relationship building activities. This is especially 
relevant to 
those of you who are in the military and if you give deployment briefings 
I 
would suggest that you read this story during the briefings.

My Father's Voice

by Deena M. Beck Ehlert

With supper finished it was mom's time for a break from her children. It 
was 
our time to be with dad. Cindy, my eight-year old sister, got the book 
while 
Tom, my six-year old brother, and I (four-years old)
climbed on our gray couch. Book in hand, Cindy joined us on the couch and 
we 
all waited for mom to start the old reel-to-reel tape player. Dad was 
piloting 
airplanes in Vietnam for the Air Force. His one-year
isolated tour would be over soon and he would be coming home.

Throughout the year of his physical absence, our family received at least 
one 
tape a week from dad. Mom played a section to us every day. Dad began 
each 
day's session by asking each of us how our day had
gone and what we had done. Speaking to the tape machine as if he could 
hear 
every word, each of us told him about our adventures. Unbeknownst to us, 
mom 
wrote down our responses so dad was kept up-to-date. In the subsequent 
tape, 
he praised our good deeds and gently corrected our errors. After everyone 
told 
dad their tales, he read to us from the book mom had sent. Cindy turned 
the 
pages while Tom and I followed along to his voice. Sometimes dad recorded 
himself teaching English to Vietnamese children in his neighborhood. It 
was 
always fun to hear the children talk in the strange language. Today, I 
don't 
remember the stories dad read, but I do remember the feelings I felt. I 
knew 
my father loved me because he talked to us nearly everyday, albeit by 
tape.

Near the end of dad's year away, mom told us we were going to meet dad in 
California. We would be staying with Aunt Jenna Vee and Uncle Jack until 
dad 
arrived. The house was big, and it had a swimming pool! Mom loaded us all 
up 
and we made the few days journey from Texas to California. I was anxious 
to 
hear dad's voice again but had no recollection of what he looked like.

The day before dad was scheduled to arrive, all of us were lounging 
around the 
swimming pool. Cindy was diving off the diving board, and Tom and I were 
holding onto the edge of the pool because our feet
could not touch bottom. Tom and I were working our way back to the steps 
to 
get out of the pool when the gate in the fence opened. A tall man dressed 
in a 
uniform walked through the gate. My sister jumped
off the diving board, ran squealing at the top of her lungs towards the 
man, 
and threw herself into his arms. Mom walked in behind the man, yelling at 
Cindy to get off him because she was getting him all wet. While hugging 
my 
sister and laughing at mom, the man embraced mom then kissed her.

Puzzled by all the commotion, Tom and I looked at each other and silently 
wondered who our sister and mother were hugging. Soon, the tall, 
uniformed, 
and wet man disentangled himself and walked toward my
brother and I who were still hanging on the side of the pool. He arrived 
at 
the pool's edge and smiled down upon us. He looked so tall. With the 
innocence 
of a four-year old, I looked up at the man and
asked, "Are you my father?" He burst into tears, knelt down, pulled us 
both 
out of the pool and into his arms, and said, "Yes. I am your father." The 
moment I heard his voice I recognized it as my dad's
because it was the same voice I heard so frequently reading me stories on 
tape. This was the voice that asked us questions and listened so intently 
to 
our answers. He seemed not to care that we were getting his uniform even 
wetter. Tom and I both threw our arms around his neck as my father's 
embrace 
tightened around us.

This is the first time I recall seeing my father. The man with the loving 
voice.

There is also a copy of this story on our website. 
http://www.daads.com/Fathers.html

If you have a story that you would like to share email it to me and I 
will put 
it up on the website.

Please forward this story and activity to those who you think would 
benefit 
from it.

Dads at a Distance (Daad)
Aaron Larson, Director
For ideas and activities on how to strengthen long distance
relationships with children, visit the Daads website at 
http://www.daads.com

To sign up for the FREE weekly email service that sends you 
an idea for a long distance relationship building activity 
and reminds you to do something that week to build those
relationships, visit the daads website and sign up at the 
bottom of the homepage.

**************************
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4th Annual Smart Marriages conference was held June 29 - July 2, 2000, 
DENVER  
http://www.smartmarriages.com/conferencedetails.html to order
tapes of the workshops and keynotes.  

Information will be posted about the 5th annual conference as soon as
it is available.   

List your program in the Directory of Providers at:
 http://www.smartmarriages.com/directory_browse.html 

Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education, LLC (CMFCE)
Diane Sollee, Director
5310 Belt Rd. NW, Washington, DC 20015-1961
www.smartmarriages.com
202-362-3332  (FAX 202-362-0973)   Email: cmfce at smartmarriages.com 